Monday, August 16, 2004

TWIB Notes from Ahhhhround the Majors

I don't have a lot to write about today, so I decided to do what was done on "This Week in Baseball" when it was a particularly boring few days. BTW, you have to say that in the slurred drawl of TWIB host Mel Allen ... and you have to read this in the voice of TWIB editor Warner Fussell.

- There are some leftovers from my party. First off, I don't think I gave Aly enough thanks in yesterday's entry. A tremendous job by my girlfriend. Easily the nicest thing that any girl has done for me ever. That's why I love her so much, she's just the best.

- I was sitting in my cube today, trying to decide whether the people going to the NAMSS conference in Miami need two six foot counters or three four counters when this woman named Leann began talking to the woman on the other side of my cube.

Leann is a fat, peppy red head with absolutely nothing of interest to say to anyone. Think of the secretary in "Office Space" mixed with a dash of Grace, Ed Rooney's secretary from "Ferris Beuller" and you have the perfect picture of Leann.

So she starts talking about her new baby (which I am convinced she had just so she could prove to everyone that someone actually had sex with her) and how hard it is to breast feed. "The pump is killing my breasts," she said. "Oh, my breasts are always so sore, I'm like, 'Honey you just ate!'" And she wasn't whispering this shit, she was talking like she discussing the weather, not her sad, saggy juggs.

Why do people talk like that? Why do they think anyone gives a shit? Honestly, if I started talking about the shit that I took or the piss that I had to take, don't you think someone tell me to kindly keep my mouth shut? Of course they would.

- The Red Sox are driving me nuts. At the beginning of this inning, Lowe was cruising with the Sox up 5-1. Cabrera has blown two routine plays, including one that should've been a double play. This team is unbelievable. Last year they would routinely snatch victory from the jaws of defeat, now it's the opposite way around.

BTW, because Kevin Youkilis is out for two or three days, regular first baseman Doug Mientkzvich (that is not how you spell his name and I'm too lazy to look it up)is playing second tonight. And in all honesty, hasn't been doing that bad.

- I'm thinking about looking for a new job. I may try my hand at PR, but tomorrow is when I'm going to start looking. I am still beat from last night. And I wanted to do some work on my comic strip. I have a pretty good idea for a character-based strip about these guys in college.

Basically it's going to be a lot of my old stories drawn out and some over exaggerated. The one stumbling block is my female form art. I can't draw chicks. Oh well, looks like I'm going to have to start practicing. Maybe I'll nab my dad's Gray's Anatomy book.

OK, I'll talk to you guys either Wednesday or tomorrow.

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