On Facebook I was asked to list my top ten all-time albums that most influenced me. Since I can't list anything without a huge explanation, this is it. Not only that but I'm writing about my Top 19 instead of my Top 10.
Here's what I wrote on Facebook today, "Here's another quick story: when I first heard this album, I was about 15-years-old. When you're 15-years-old, there is a weird dichotomy in your brain. You want to be part of a group, but at the same time, you want to be unique. You want to tell the entire world to go fuck itself but at the same time you're deathly afraid of doing so. You done with being a kid but you can't begin to handle adult responsibilities. Therefore you begin to find ways of trying to express yourself, your frustrations, your confusion, find someone or something that has similar problems; otherwise you might explode. For me, it was this cassette tape put out by five guys who were figuratively and literally the opposite of me and my entire surroundings. They expressed the frustrations and confusion that I was experiencing every day. Maybe what they were rapping about wasn't exactly relatable--I didn't have a problem with the police or women weren't rying to convince me that they were carrying my baby--but the emotions that they conveyed did."
I've written about NWA a lot. Probably more than any other band that I've listened to, which is weird because they only really had one album that I liked. The other two, "100 Miles and Runnin' " and "Efil4Zaggin" had their moments, but once Ice Cube left, the band sort of fell apart into a self-parody of what they once were.
So I think what prompts me to continuously write about a band--actually an album--that I really loved when I was 15-years-old is how it made me feel at that age. Like I wrote up top, there's a lot of pushing and pulling in a teenager's head. You need to make sure that you get that frustration out before it boils over. Just be listening to "Straight Outta Compton" allowed me to relieve some of that pressure. It was loud, it was aggressive, it was in-your-face, it didn't give a fuck. All of those things are the opposite of me. When I rapped along with NWA, I wasn't Byron Magrane anymore. I was someone completely different.
And I think that's why this album was such a hit with a lot of kids that I knew. Sure, the words and what they say are shocking the first 100 times you listen to them. After awhile though, if you're still listening, the message is even more reticent. Like everyone wants to be in a gang--I'm not talking about the crips or the bloods--I'm talking about being in a group of people with like minded thoughts. Not only that but you want your gang on the outside. There's no fun in being the favorite, the underdog, the downtrodden, the group that's going to rise up and show those bourgeois pigs who's boss was where you wanted to be. You want to be the group of people who sees through the bullshit and speaks truth to power.
That was NWA. This group was popular, but they couldn't get on MTV or the radio. They sold millions of albums, yet you never saw them on any late night shows. They were the World's Most Dangerous Band and when you're 15 or 16-years-old, that's how you feel. No one really recognizes you. You're doing stuff, some of it great, but no one cares. In fact the only responses you get are negative. "Clean your room!" "Do your homework!" "Dump that beer in the fire!" "Run 15 laps!"
You're powerless and it sucks. You know who else was powerless? Ice Cube, MC Ren, Dr. Dre, Eazy E and Yella Boy. You know who fought back? That's right, NWA. If they can do it, why couldn't we? At least that was the theory.
One day we were all talking. The annual lip-sync was approaching and they were looking for acts. Wouldn't it be awesome if a bunch of us did "Fuck the Police"? Could you imagine the principal and the vice principal and everyone else totally freaking out? They'd talk about us for years! We'd be the (very white) NWA of Amesbury, MA. The more we talked about it, the more a plan formed. "I have a White Sox, Raiders and LA Kings hat!" "I have these awesome Locs!" "I know the dude who does the PA for the lip sync, we can tell them that we're going to do 'Express Yourself' and at the last minute substitute 'Fuck the Police'!"
We must have talked about this plan for hours, getting us more and more excited. The lip-sync day came and went, and myself and my friends sat in the audience. We never put the plan into action. In fact, I don't think we ever talked about it again.
We weren't NWA. We weren't anywhere even close. We were just four scared white boys who talked shit and never backed it up. NWA may as well have been Spider-Man or Bat Man; we'd never be like them. That's okay. Not everyone can be iconoclasts. That's what makes them special. The rest of us just have to bask in their glory and dream.
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