This issue of Peter Parker, The Spectacular Spider-Man opens
up with the Angel in a lot of trouble. If there’s one thing that we’ve learned
over these last four months is that the Angel is ALWAYS in a lot of trouble. He’s
trouble so much, he could be a Disney Princess. There are a few differences
this time:
He’s AND Spider-Man are in trouble
The guy causing the trouble is his best buddy, Bobby Drake
AKA Ice Man
It’s not an X-Men or Champions book, it’s a Spidey book
In any event a mind-controlled Ice Man is chasing the Angel
and the Spider and he’s actually using his powers to their utmost abilities. He’s
chucking ice daggers at them, he’s cooled the entire building so that the two
heroes are freezing and using more energy to keep them warm (thus slowing them
down and making them easier targets) and he chucked a giant, spiked ice ball at
them.
And to make matters better, he’s not whining. Like at all!
This means that crippled super villain and second-rate Tony
Stark, Stuart Clarke (his name rhymes with Tony’s!), who has had zero training
as Ice Man AND is in fact unconscious right now, is a better Ice Man than
un-hypnotized Bobby Drake. In fact, Ice Man should sing, “Clarke-y, Clarke-y,
Clarke-y can’t you see? Sometimes it’s better when you hypnotize me!”
Maybe not. But he probably should.
As the fight is going on, we get a couple of flashbacks as
to how this all happened. Immediately after the Champions broke up, Ice Man
heads to the hospital (as Ice Man, BTW; not Bobby Drake) to Clarke’s hospital
room where he’s bandaged, paralyzed and in a coma. For days, Ice Man stays
there soliloquizing about how sorry he is for what happened and how it sucks
for Clarke to be all messed up. If you’ve forgotten, in order to get rid of the
Champions (after he was knocked out by Black Widow’s dad, Ivan [remember him?]),
Clarke (as Rampage) presses the self-destruct button on his costume, which blew
him up. So while, I’m usually up for an Ice Man beatdown, this isn’t his fault
at all. Nor is it the Champions’ fault either.
So, Ice Man is sitting there, feeling sorry for himself when
the bandaged Clarke tells him to come closer. He then blows hypnotizing gas in
the icy mutant’s face and Bobby is his slave. I have no idea how Clarke was physically
able to get the chemicals that he needed to do that, but he did – it was
explained that these chemicals were found in the hospital, which okay. But how did
he stand up and get them. They’ve made a pretty large point of saying that
Clarke is a cripple. Again, I don’t know.
After the flashback, Ice Man is really kicking these heroes’
collective asses. At one point he calls Angel “Daddy Warbucks” again and grabs
him by the throat. As he’s doing this to his best buddy, he’s freezing him at
the same time, which is a pretty bad ass move. I’ve read probably about 20
comics with Ice Man in them over the last four months and this is the most
ruthless I’ve ever seen him. And it’s not like it’s a new writer at the helm,
this is still Bill Mantlo who has been writing the character for over two
years.
Spider-Man isn’t about to watch the Angel die (awwwww,
mannnnnn) so he tackles Ice Man out a 35th story window. As they’re falling,
they’re still fighting and Spidey manages to bring the duo into a car wash. The
“scalding hot steam” melts Ice Man and snaps him out of his stupor. And this is
why Spider-Man is so awesome, after he kicks Bobby’s ass he thinks, “Oh yeah,
people might not know who he is” and he webs up a mask so that Ice Man can keep
his secret identity!
Peter Parker puts the “friendly” in Friendly Neighborhood
Spider-Man.
As the two were fighting, three businessmen burst into the
Champions building – seriously, you guys, you didn’t see the donnybrook going
on here – to talk to the Angel about the building. They actually represent the
construction company that screwed the Champions over and they want to reach an
understanding. We don’t hear what they say to him, but the Angel flips out and
starts flapping his wings creating a mini-hurricane which tussles papers,
glasses fall off and ties are askew.
It’s a bad scene.
The businessmen are so freaked out that they tell the Angel
his debts are cancelled, the property is rented and the place will be repaired,
free of charge. I guess business was done differently in the late 1970s.
(I'm glad Trump doesn't have wings! Wocka, wocka!)
The three talk about getting Clarke back to the hospital and
Ice Man tells the others that he has a lot of thinking to do, but he’s going
out on his own. I guess he’s going to wander around a bit like Caine from the
TV show “Kung-Fu”. And that’s about it.
There are two buttons to the story:
The camera that the Angel gave to Spider-Man is broken after
he took it through the carwash. So he doesn’t get the camera or his fight with
Ice Man.
Flash Thompson is walking around campus with his new girlfriend
that he got while in Vietnam (“I went to Vietnam and all I got was this lousy
girlfriend!”). They’re so in love that they almost get smashed in the back of
the head by a Frisbee. Good thing that Hector Ayala is there to save them both.
You remember Hector Ayala right? He’s the White Tiger!
This was another really good issue. I think that when Spidey
is part of the crew, things work really well. Angel isn’t as much of an ass and
even though Bobby was hypnotized through much of these two issues, he was cool
(HA!) too. Plus Ice Man actually used his imagination and jammed his feet on
the accelerator when it came to his powers. He was really fucking shit up. Too
bad he can’t do that all the time. The Clarke story was pretty lame, but what
are you going to do? I’ve read much worse.
Sal Buscema did another great job with his art, though the
cover was a little sketchy (he didn’t do that). I do like how someone is still holding out hope that the Champions are going to be a thing again, with the bubble, "A Champion Gone Mad!" Stop trying to make the Champions happen, Gretchen! It's not going to happen!
All-in-all, I’d give this story four bullied half-Peter,
half-Spider-Man, Spidey Senses! (Pretty sick burn by Flash Thompson, BTW. "This is a bowling alley! Not a knitting parlor!" Eat that, Puny Parker!)
Jesus, Parker's practically Bobby Drake in that panel. "Oooh, I'll punch you one day, Flash! You just wait and see!" Spoiler Alert: he doesn't!
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