How I Spent My Summer Vacation

Those of you that haven't been reading 19Thoughts for very long may be surprised to realize that I actually have an underwater correspondent. Actually, he's a famous underwater correspondent. Everyone knows him, but let me start off with an actual email I received from the guy (there is some salty language here, which is appropriate, because he lives under the sea):

Dear Ass-Face:

Now that you're "drawing" crappy cartoons about douchebags, all of a sudden you're too important to answer my emails, faxes and phone calls? Well, screw you pal, I've got a million better things to do with my time than to waste my time on the owner of third-rate Blog. Consider this the last correspondence that I'll ever send you, unless you let me write a column. Up yours.

Yours in Christ,

Aquaman

With such a forceful message like that, how could I ignore the guy? Plus, it's nice to have a celebrity around, it really classes the place up. So without further adieu, I present Aquaman and his Summer Tale. (BTW stick around for my latest book review.)



Thanks cockpunch, I'm serious about this though ... you better give me my forum or you're going to get your balls ripped off by a tuna. Hey everyone, wow what a summer, huh? I did a lot of cool stuff and I can't wait to tell you all about it!

As you can tell from the above picture, I spent most of the early part of the season working on my pitching form. My agent thought that she heard that the Red Sox were looking for a submariner for their bullpen, but they ended up getting these two scrubs:



Look at that those two jerks, they couldn't get anyone out ... it's obvious that they throw like chicks. Yeah, I said it, chicks. Women. Dames. Broads. Anyway you slice it, Aquaman could throw better than those two jerks. And I can prove it, for most of June I spent at least 20 minutes every day throwing to Tusky, Aqualad and my wife Mera nothing but heat.

And guess what, none of them got a hit off me ... well, that's not true, Mera hit a lot of dingers off me, but she was always wasted, so that really shouldn't count. Anyway, I had my heater all ready to go, but no one ever called. You figure that the Marlins or the Mariners would call, I'm a nautical dude and all, but they didn't. I don't care, they can all rot in hell. Baseball sucks.

After my major league dreams died, I started to focus on more important things, like drinking. I don't know why, I just enjoy doing it, so stay the fuck out of my face. Sorry, I didn't mean that ... sometimes when I have a few too many Fuzzy Navels, my dander gets up. Where was I? Oh yeah, drinking.

Even though we live in Atlantis and have been independent forever, we still have the fourth of July. Sure, no one except me celebrates it, but we still have it. I woke up early that morning and started to get my drinking groove on. I invited the guys (Aqualad and Tusky) over and they brought over a case of Zimas.

I don't drink that fag shit, so I walked to the store and picked up some Fuzz-ay Navel (that's what I call it) mix and some booze. On the way over, I picked up some fireworks, I'm talking a buttload of them. We were going to have some fun and really celebrate the Fourth of July correctly.

The Fuzzy Navels were going down smoothly, as were the Zimas and after about 15 minutes we were all properly oiled up and I pulled out my stash. I aimed a bottle rocket at Tusky, and he completely freaked out! Even though we were miles beneath the ocean, I was able to light it and it shot right at him. Being a walrus, he has great reflexes and just missed him, but guess who it hit? That's right Aqualad, right in the eye! Literally, a bullseye!

I've got game, man ... way better than Green Arrow. For the next 45 minutes, I shot bottle rockets, Roman candles at them as well as throwing sparklers. Instead of leaving, these two dudes stuck around and took it like men. That gets all of Aquaman's respect. Much respect to those two guys, but I still shot fireworks at them until they were bloody or until I passed out. I can't remember what happened next.

For a few weeks, I was really bored and nothing was going on at the Hall of Justice, so I was pulling some of my trademark Aquaman Punks with the surface dwellers. I have a couple of fish buddies that happen to be sharks, so what I did was telepathically tell them that there was a lot of fat tourists off the waters of Florida. Well, you don't have to tell these guys that twice and they were up there two or three days a week for the next three weeks.

Apparently they got a couple of kids and it was on the news for a little while ... the story du jour, if you will. I'm not sure if I spelled that word correctly, I'm not good with Romanian words. So, that sea disaster was all my doing. But, it was wicked funny, so you have to give me a pass.

Towards the end of August, I thought it would be a riot to ruin a major American metropolis, so I chose ... no, not New Orleans, what are you on crack, but Pierre, South Dakota. Unfortunately, that city was a bit more landlocked than I remembered, so not much happened. I think a couple of toilets backed up, but that's enough for old AM. You should've seen the people who owned that house though. They had to buy a plunger and everything!

You've been PUNKED! My friend ... say adios to your $5. Again, I'm not sure if I spelled that foreign word right. Romanian ain't my bag, but that's how the kids of today talk. I wish everyone would just talk American.

Well, that's enough from me today. I'm going to think up some more maritime pranks. Until then, go eat a shit stapler.

Thanks, Aquaman for that fine report on all of your summer hijinks. Speaking of hijinks, I finally read Mark Twain's "Pudd'nhead Wilson" last week. I was originally supposed to read this for one of my college courses, but I blew it off and only read the first 30 pages.

That was a pretty stupid move on my part because this was a really interesting book, probably one of the better books that I was supposed to read. As usual, Twain does a great job of setting the scene and painting the picture of a small town on the Mississippi River and the events of a few weeks that changed the began with a pretty innocuous event that eventually changed the lives of the entire town.

The Reader's Digest version is that a slave freaks out and thinks that her master is going to sell her down the river, so she decides that if this happens to her, that's cool, but it's not going to happen to her newborn son ... who also happens to be the same age and looks a bit like the newborn of her master. She switches the kids and the kid who is supposed to be white eventually becomes a slave and the black kid (Tom Driscoll) lives the prevailed life.

Twenty years pass and the black kid has become somewhat of a prick, as he has a gambling problem which causes him to burglar homes from neighborhood towns. As this crime spree happens, two Italian twins come into town, which instantly makes them celebrities. One of the twins ends up kicking Driscoll in the ass, which pisses him off. But since he's a wuss, he won't fight the Italian twin. So his uncle, who is now Tom's guardian because his "father" died earlier, takes it upon himself to defend the family honor.

He ends up wounding the Italian and all is forgotten. In the mean time, Tom ends up gambling more than he should and to pay his debtors he tries to rob his uncle, but ends up killing him. The twins happen to be there and they get framed for the murder. Pudd'nhead Wilson (who was named that because he said something stupid the first day he came to town) has to defend the twins in court and it all works out at the end.

There's a ton more detail in this story, and it's a pretty decent story. Mark Twain really understands both the common man and the clever man, as well as the thoughts of a scoundrel and a righteous person. Each character may be an archetype, but the way that he writes each character and he moves the plot along is flawless. While not on par with his masterpiece, "The Adventures of Huck Finn", this is truly a lost classic that is a breezy and fun read.

Also included in this book is a story called "Those Extraordinary Twins" that Twain said was buried in the Pudd'nhead Wilson book. He wrote that he had to extract this story from the book in order to make both of them better. TET was based on the Italian Twins who come to town in Pudd'nhead Wilson, but they were Siamese twins.

It's a very cool read on the dichotomy of two completely different people living in the same body and how they handle it.

Wedding crap and other stuff

Everyone told me it was a chore, but I didn’t listen.

“It will be different for me,” I said. They just smiled.

“You will be glad when this whole this over,” they warned. I didn’t believe.

Now I believe.

Planning for a wedding just sucks. Here’s the deal, I don’t have to make plans for much of the day, but it still stinks. As Rick Pitino once opined, “It stinks and it sucks.” The minutia of the details are enough to make the guy from “A Beautiful Mind” take a step back and say, “Jesus, calm down a bit.”

I mistakenly thought that the hard part were the big parts: the church, the reception hall, the band, what we are going to eat. Man, was I wrong. The hard parts are the little things, the stuff that shouldn’t make much of a difference, but do. To whom, I have no idea. But they matter.

It’s easy to say that the blame falls on the shoulders of the usual suspects: me or Aly or my parents or Aly’s parents, but that’s not the truth. The truth is that there is some unseen gremlin that gets inside everyone’s head and just rips their logic circuits out. Things that shouldn’t be a huge deal become monster deals. Simple chores, like picking out song listings or finding a babysitter become Herculean tasks.

And then you find out so much about the people you invite: one person is bringing a guest even though she wasn’t invited with one, close friends say no (which is cool) or just don’t return their invites (not cool), one person even asked if there was another menu choice … even though we’re offering three different dishes. It never ends.

The one piece of veteran advice that I am listening to is to picture myself on a beach in Hawaii in mid-October: seas quietly crashing on the beach, a warm air goes by, a cold beer is in my hand and the horizon runs for ever. That’s the tranquility that has been getting me through these long dog days.

The one good thing is that I’m only doing this once … maybe twice. (Just a joke)

* The destruction in New Orleans is so vast that two of our big conferences have been cancelled. The National Association of Healthcare Quality (NAHQ) and the American Association of Healthcare Administrative Management (AAHAM) both axed their shows yesterday. While I’m indifferent to AAHAM, I’m actually really pumped about NAHQ because this was a gigantic show and has been causing me a lot of sleepless nights.

Down in the Big Easy, water is rising to an unprecedented level. The entire city is under Marshall Law and people are looting like crazy. It’s unlike anything that I have ever seen. The streets have turned into river ways, people are standing on their roofs hoping to get the attention of rescuers, other people are breaking into nursing homes and hospitals looking for drugs and food.

This tragedy has brought out the best and worst in folks. People from around the country are helping as best they can with their time, their money, even their blood. Some of the people in the city are not doing themselves very proud with the looting though.

It’s easy for me to be in Boston and wag my finger and say, “Looting is wrong, eat your own food and medicine.” The fact is this, they don’t have their own food and medicine. Everything has been washed out to sea. I understand that and do not hold it against the folks that legitimately need food and medicine, but the people who are stealing guns, electronics, video games … these are the people that aren’t wrapping themselves in glory or pity.

In 2001 when the twin towers were struck, people banded together, they didn’t lash out and loot. Where is that spirit?

* I’ve been getting a lot of compliments for my last strip and I just want to say thank you to everyone who has been reading along. I reread my first Blog entry done on the day that I put up my first strip. In it I asked for readers to be patient, I will get better and better as the weeks go by and I think that I have. Sure there are a few bumps here and there, but I’m glad that you all have stuck with me. Thank you.

* Next Friday is my birthday. I’m going to be 31-years-old. I don’t know how I feel about it, I guess I’m just ambivalent about the day. It’s going to come and when it does, big deal. It’s not like time is going to stop and I’m going to be 30 forever and that’s ok. I don’t want to be this age for the rest of my life.

At one point I wanted to forever live in my late teens and early 20s. I raged against aging and it was a useless battle. But after thinking about why I was so mad about growing up I realized that I wasn’t pissed at getting old, I was pissed at getting responsibilities. I have since learned that this isn’t the worst thing in the world.

* The one thing that I’ve always loved about my birthday is that we’re getting into the fall season for television. Monday September 19th begins the new season of “Arrested Development” and I can’t wait. During August FOX ran three mini marathons on consecutive Fridays and I TiVoed them all.

Since FOX isn’t big on reruns, I forgot how funny all of these shows were. They were tremendous. I can’t wait until the next season starts. Charlize Theron is going to be guest starring in five episodes. If that isn’t a reason to watch, then I don’t know what is.

Also starting up in September is a new season of “Curb Your Enthusiasm”. I think that the last time a new episode was on was back in March 2004. That’s 18 months. Though it was once my favorite, AD has taken over. But a solid number two show.
Add that to the new seasons of “The Simpsons” and “Family Guy”, plus the Patriots and the Sox and it’s going to be a very busy month.

This weekend, probably on Sunday I’m going to try and post a new Aquaman Blog. He’s been bugging me lately, so I figured I’d give him his say. Peace.

Women and Pictures

This week's Room 19 is sort of autobiographical. The key words in that last sentence is "sort of". About eight years ago a new magazine burst on the scene, you may have heard of it, its called Maxim. My brother had a subscription and one day I was leafing through it. There was an article on how to attract chicks and keep them in your bedroom (because that's where the "magic" happens).

Among the list of things to have in your room (besides a plant and some nice wine glasses) were pictures of you and your buddies. They said girls eat this stuff up because it shows that you're not all about sports, Star Wars and Cindy Crawford. It proved that you could have meaningful, deep relations with other people. That is what this week's strip is about.

I know what you're thinking, "Strip? Cindy Crawford? Now you're speaking my language, old buddy!" Check out www.room19comics.com to see what I'm talking about.

A week after I read that article, I found a bunch of pictures of my friends and family and put them on the wall. The next part proved to be a little tougher, now I had to get a girl up there. Eventually one did wander off the street and upstairs and guess what the first thing she mentioned was? That's right, my vast collection of baseball hats on the wall (for that touch of class), but she after that she made a bee-line to the pictures. Thank you, Maxim.

BTW, all of the other Maxim hints didn't work too well, so I believe it was beginer's luck.

In this episode Eddie has just told Kurt about his new discovery, Kurt rolls his eyes and sort of goes with it. I am keeping with the old hockey logo t-shirts. This week Eddie is sporting a Hartford Whalers jersey. Even though they got their asses kicked every game by the Bruins and they played in a mall, the Whale were pretty cool. I miss those Nutmeggers.

The second panel is probably my favorite panel that I've ever drawn, I used a style that I first drew in this strip:
August 03 and I think it works when trying to set the scene for a party. Hell, if you think back to a big college party, more than 90% of the people there are faceless anyway.

When I showed Aly the inital sketches, she said, "No says 'nightcap' anymore" and that is the point. Eddie is sort of socially awkward, at least enough to be taking advice from a men's magazine that he'd actually use a corn-ball line. Best of all, it worked.

I think that the last two panels work well as the chick he brought up stairs got completely excited by pictures (and there are girls who do get that jazzed, we all know them). And look at the big grin on Eddie's face, he just knows that he's going to get some action tonight. That was my biggest task in doing this particular strip, I wanted Ed to have a huge grin, but I didn't want him to look crazy.

And as with most of Eddie's plans, they are ruined by the fourth panel. The shirt's off, no shoes, he's on the bed and his babe is still looking at pictures two hours later. I think this is a pretty good strip, but if there is one thing I wish I did a bit different, is to reverse the order of the last two weeks. I would have this one be the first strip and last week's August 24 be this week's.

Oh well, these are the lessons you learn when starting out.

They're driving me nuts

And when I say "they" I mean the Boston Red Sox.

For a little over 40 days the Sox have been in first place, but the lead has never been iron-clad. The reason? Boston has simply not been able to pull away from a beaten-up, star-struck New York Yankees teams. Once the Sox' lead got large, they would begin to play terribly and the Yankees would start playing great.

While each bullpen has been terrible (save for Mariano Rivera) it all begins with the starting rotation. If your starters pitch better, your relievers don't have to pitch as much and thus can be saved. For a textbook example of this look at last year's New York Yankees whose bullpen was completely cooked in September and October.

This year, the Yanks have a starting rotation that is headed by the rotting corpse of Randy Johnson, the wildly inconsistent Mike Mussina, the immortal Aaron Small, Shawn Chacon and Jaret "Get me back to Atlanta and Leo Mazzone" Wright. Yet, as of this entry, they are 1.5 games behind the Sox for first place.

Not that the Red Sox starting staff is much better, Curt Schilling has been an absolute mess, David Wells has had his good days and his bad (and if it sounds as if I'm talking about someone's grandfather, check out the age of Boomer some time), guitar strumming Bronson Arroyo, knuckleballer Tim Wakefield and Matt Clement. Of the five, only Clement has been considered "good" and I doubt that you'd find a Sox fan who has a lot of confidence in him.

So there's the problem: starting pitching. Neither the Red Sox or the Yankees have a very good staff. What is so disappointing about this turn of events is that the Red Sox won last year's World Series due to a great starting staff. They had a number one and one-A starters at the top of their rotation, two decent number three guys (Wakefield and Arroyo). The only stiff was Derek Lowe, but he was tremendous in the post season, so that wipes away his crappy year.

The question remains, did Sox GM Theo Epstein honestly feel that this year's staff was as good as last year's starting five? You have to say no, but what could he do? His prime off season target, Carl Pavano, has completely sucked in New York and could be done for the season with an injury. Clement and Wells were expected to be the solid two and three starters with Wake and Arroyo backing them up. There really wasn't any one else on the free agent or trade markets, so he made crap lemonade out of some crappy lemons.

The biggest problem for Boston is that one injury bug has ripped chunks of the Sox' staff to hell. Schilling has made a total of seven starts this year (also, he's worked some not-so-dominant innings in the bullpen) which had to be unseen. As you may recall, and how could you forget, Schilling was superhuman last October as doctors manueved parts of his ankle so the man could pitch without pain. Those sutures and maneuvers are a large part of why the Sox are floundering today.

This leads us to the inevitable question: would you trade the greatness of yesterday for the mediocrity of today? At the time every Sox fan made the same Faustian bargain, "As long as Boston wins the Series, I don't care if Schilling ever pitches another inning again." It looks like we may have gotten our wish as Curt Schilling has been pitching like Curt Young. While infuriating now, I would not go back on that "deal".

Yes, it sucks that the Sox are so damn inconsistent, but last year was magical and will never be topped. No one is saying that the Sox are done, but I'm beginning to sweat a bit. The one saving grace for the Sox (and the Yanks as well) has been their offense.

What do they say about great offenses and the post season?

Better Living Through Lying

The good news is that I'm feeling much better than I did Sunday and even yesterday. The bad news is that I think that I may have pulled something in my stomach when I was puking on Sunday. It feels as if someone is punching me right in the old sternum. But we're not here to talk about my alcoholic tendencies, that's for the entry under this one. We're here to talk about the new strip.

What new strip you ask? This one: www.room19comics.com

I hate to pat myself on the back (no, I really do) but it always amazes me how much better the strip looks after I ink it. When I finished with the pencils on Friday I just looked at it with disgust. It was flat, sort of boring and it sort of just laid flat on the page. But on Sunday after I was done with the inking, it seemed to be pop a lot more. This is a minor miracle, because on Sunday night I was near death.

If there is one thing that I wish I could do, it would be to add more black. Originally Kurt's shirt was supposed to be black, but I liked the way that I positioned Kurt in the first panel. In the long run, it's probably not that great of a position, but I usually don't draw him at a 3/4 position, so I thought that blackening his shirt would be sort of a waste of that pose.

BTW, the logo on Kurt's shirt is for Violet Lemons. What's that? It's a logo that I had to come up with for my Adobe Illustrator class. I thought it was pretty neat and I couldn't think of anything good at the time. So, that's what the VL stands for.

The first three panels are pretty typical of what I've been writing. Eddie sets it up, Kurt reacts and then there is that somewhat awkward silence. I really think that the silence sets up the final panel.

As far as the fourth panel goes, I am happy with the expression on Eddie's face. I think that it's absolutely perfect for what he says. When haven't we lied to our buddies to make ourselves feel better? It's done all of the time. And it's usually never malicious. It's just an easy thing to do sometimes.

There are a few things that I wish I and trying to improve with my art and I'm not sure if I'm doing a decent enough job. It's where to put the arms, Kurt looks absolutely wooden in the first panel. The other thing are shoulders. Most of the time I catch a bad shoulder, but there are times when they just sneak in there. This is also in the first panel and is also a part of Kurt's figure. I think that's what gives him the wooden look.

Otherwise this is a bang-up job.

That which does not kill me ...

Yes, I know this was due yesterday, but I was way too hung over to write anything, so I’m stealing a couple of minutes from work to write this out.

Saturday was a lot of fun, even if I don’t remember anything after 9:30. It all started at 11:30 when I met Ryan and Jay at Michael’s Harborside in Newburyport. Jay was getting ice for the big shabang and Rye was helping him. By the time I pulled up, they were done and wanted a drink.

We went upstairs and the bartender (who Jay knows pretty well, because he works there) made us each an Absolut and Red Bull. These weren’t the kind that we were drinking in Ireland (those were basically double shots and a full can of RB), these were in pint glasses and there was a ton of vodka in there.

After that we met up with the rest of the guys at my parents’ place. Archie, Fitz, Ed, Dan were already there (Archie gave me a fifth of whiskey) and Skaus, Brownie, Jamie and Byrnie ended up coming before we started out for golf. Also accompanying us were Bob, Uncle Gene and dad. This was going to be quite an adventure.

We had a tee-time at 1:30 at Evergreen in Newburyport, and the course looked beat to crap … which is not a big deal since we all pretty much suck. Ryan was the only one that didn’t golf, he just drove the cart around slamming into mine and Archie’s ride. I think that I shot a 62, but since I haven’t played since May of last year, I’m not too sad about that. And to be truthful, by the time the fourth hole came around, I was hitting longer and straighter.

We pounded some beers on the course and by about 3:30 we were on our way back to my folks. That’s when the drinking began, Jay did a hell of a job getting beers and food and by the time we got started with Wiffle ball, Roy showed up. Like usual, Wiffle ball was a lot of fun. We had sort of a round-robin tournament where everyone played.

But the playing isn’t the fun part, it’s the drinking and razzing the other guy that’s the good time. Telling Ryan or Jay that I own them after I strike one of them out, or them pointing and grandstanding after they hit a dinger … that’s what it’s all about. It was like being in college again. We had our brews, burgers and Wiffle ball. I think that everyone really enjoyed themselves.

At about 8, the limo showed up. We loaded a cooler in the back (Jay bought about 200 beers) and all 11 of us jammed in to the back (Andrew showed up around 6, which was really cool of him) and we made our way to Portsmouth. The first place that we stopped off was the Red Hook Brewery. I had never been there before, so it was cool to finally see what the place was like. Also, their beer isn’t too bad.

The only that sort of sucked is that was dead, so I nabbed a pint glass (BTW, I have no idea where it is now) and we headed to the Gas Light in downtown Portsmouth. This is my New Hampshire Waterloo.

It all started out pretty good, we made our way in, there was a cover band that was that bad and I ordered a beer. Then Brownie got me a shot of tequila. Here’s an aside that I don’t think too many people know, I can’t do hard alcohol any more, the old body just can’t take it, but if I do imbibe the hard stuff it’s usually scotch of vodka. There are three kinds of hard alcohol that ruins me: tequila, Jaeggermeister and Jameson. Please keep that in mind.

Then Jay and I started to walk around and we met these two chicks, one wasn’t too bad looking, the other was beat. When Jay and I are out, we start lying to girls just to do it. When we were in Cancun a few years ago, we had a bit where we’d tell chicks that I’d won the trip on the Price is Right. We play off each other very well. Saturday night, Jay and I were in the business of real estate. What did we do in real estate? “We speculate on a property, we buy it and then turn around and make a sale. We’re both very rich.”

The uglier one said I looked like Carson Daly (which I haven’t in a long time), but then they started to get annoying so we left. Byrnie grabbed me and bought me a shot, it had Jaeggermeister and Malibu rum. That’s two shots and they each had my liquid kryptonite.

After that we sort of hung around and I could tell I was getting drunker. As the night progressed Brownie grabbed me and told me I had to go see someone. It was Jesse Welch and his sister Vanessa. I haven’t seen Jesse in about five years, we were really close in high school but some stuff happened afterwards that split my group of friends up. The last time I saw Vanessa was on a plane flight to Vegas.

It was surreal. We started chatting and going on about old times and that’s when I lose track of what exactly happened next. I spoke to Skaus this morning and he said that I had two more shots, a kamikaze and a shot of Jameson (strike three). I guess I made it back to the limo and passed out. Before my face hit the seat I noticed that Jay was next to me, which was a good thing because I started puking my guts out. Luckily he heard me gurgling and was able to get my head out the door. No damage done.

Jay, being the great brother that he is, got the driver to take me back to Amesbury and put me to bed at about 11:30 or so. Then he drove back to the bar, picked up the rest of the guys and they partied into the night while I was passed out. I was bummed that I didn’t stay out later, but at the same time I was all done.

And there were a lot of shenanigans, Ryan wrestled Byrnie and got his ass kicked, then he went for Brownie and they destroyed Jay’s computer desk. Ed, Fitz, Skaus and Dan went home, but everyone else partied like they were in college, which was great to hear.

Another good thing to hear is that I don’t have any kidney stones. I went for my tests on Friday and according to initial reports, I’m free and clear.

This meta-entry is going to be lengthy

Holy crap, two entries within a week? Are you serious? Wow, I'm on an unbelieveable pace!

Despite the sarcasm, yes, you're getting another Blog entry and this is going to be interesting because on Saturday I am being taken out for my bachelor party. On Sunday, I plan to write with a hangover, so you get a before and after effect.

So, aside from some late-night Tuesday entries, where the hell have I been? I'll tell you what, I've been busy. Very busy. The last three months have been about the busiest of my life, not only has work amped up (I have about 15 conferences that I'm trying to get ready for, including two super conferneces being held at the same time) but I've had a ton of school work, the comic strip thing and the wedding. Aside from going to the gym, that is literally all I've been doing with myself.

I just finished up an Adobe Illustrator class and I had a great time with that. The teacher was awesome, a real nice guy who taught us an awful lot. He and I spoke a bit after class and he told me that I have a lot of talent, which made me feel great. I wish I could upload some of the stuff that I did in class, but I can't do it from Amesbury (that's where I am right now) and the version of Illustrator I have at home is about four years too old.

The one thing about that class is that we got tons and tons of homework. For example, this past week, I had about 4-5 hours worth of school work to do. And even though I like what I'm doing, it was still sort of hard to sit in on a Sunday afternoon and work for three hours rather than being outside enjoying myself. That's the way it goes though.

Aside from being waist-deep in work during the last couple of weeks I did get to see a Sox game. My boss took me and a few other coworkers to see the Sox play the Royals in Matt Clement's first start since getting beaned in the head. Despite spotting the Royals a four run lead, the Sox stormed back to crush them. As of last night, Kansas City has lost 18 games in a row.

They're nearing Oriole teritory. You remember the 1988 Orioles, began the year 0-21, got Cal Ripken Sr. fired, landed Billy Ripken on the cover of Sports Illustrated. It was quite a streak.

The cool thing about going to the game was that it was on a Thursday afternoon so we got to play hookey and we saw the contest from the roof box seats. Last time I was there was a 1990 game against the Yanks where Mike Greenwell hit an inside the park grand slam and the Sox won 15-1. I can't believe I can remember crap like that, but when I was in college I could barely remember my name.

So why am I in Amesbury? Simple, I am going to the hospital tomorrow for some kidney stone test and I was supposed to go to visit a doctor tonight. The latter story is a better story, so I'll tell that one first.

Faithful readers of 19Thoughts may remember that around this time last year, it was thought that I might have Grave's disease. This infects the thyroid and while it isn't fatal, it can still mess you up. In December I visited the specialist, Dr. Karbowski (I think that's how you spell his name) and he did some tests. The tests came back negative and he said that it looked as if I was in the clear, but he wanted to make sure and wondered if I could see him in June.

I said no problem and made an appointment. By the time June came, I forgot all about it and rescheduled for today. Yesterday Dr. K's secretary called and told me that I needed a referral from my primary care physician Dr. Traister. So I called his office up, but they wouldn't give me the referral because I haven't seen Traister in about a year. "That's just our policy," the receptionist said.

So I had to go to Dr. Traister's office, get a physical or something (chances are good that they would've taken my blood pressure, weighed me and told me I was good), in order to talk to Dr. K. Of course this was not going to happen in a day's time, so I would've had to cancel Dr. K's appointment for tomorrow, make an appointment with Traister, get my blood retaken, then make a new Dr. K appointment just so he can tell me I'm ok.

Does that make sense to anyone? It didn't to me either, so I told the receptionist that the policy "sucks" and hung up on her. Dr. K's receptionist was cooler and she told me that Dr. K would call me with the results of my tests today. He did and I'm looking fine as far as the Graves' disease is concerned.

Now tomorrow, I have to go to nuclear medicine and get an IVP which is an IV that fills my kidney with dye and then they are going to take a bunch of x-rays. They say that this procedure lasts for about an hour, but we'll see. I was really bummed out that I have to go to this, but if it's just for an hour, it won't be so bad.

Aside from those hospital misadventures, not much has been going on. I have been doing a lot of reading and have finished two books in the last few weeks. I'll tell you about them right now.

Not only was this one of, if not THE, best sports biographies I've ever read, it could be one of the best overall books I've ever read. From start to finish, I was completely captivated by this book.

Written by Leigh Montville, this tells the story of Ted Williams (no shit) from humble beginning to tragic end. And the best part is that it's not just about baseball. The book is about 500 pages or so and at around 220, Montville ends Ted's playing career. I remember thinking to myself, well, this is going to get slow. But it didn't. The book got better and better and better.

Montville is a hell of a journalist and really knows how to spin a tale. And the best part is that he portrayed Williams as he was, warts and all. Everyone knows what a great ball player he was, what a terrific fighter pilot and fisherman he is, but most people don't know that he's a crappy father and a lousy husband. But that's who he was, that's why Ted Williams was Ted Williams.

He was the uber-every man. What he did well he did better than anyone else and what he sucked at, he sucked really bad. He was a man of extremes and Montville plumbs those extremes with great care. It seemed that he spoke to everyone who ever said a word to Williams.

When I met him a few months ago at that book signing in Brookline, I asked him about this book and he told me that originally this was going to be a 100,000 word book that would take a year to research. In actuality it became a 200,000 word book that took two years to research. He said that Williams is just that fascinating of a person.

And I agree.

While Joe DiMaggio got a lot of ink for being such a mysterious and alluring man, which is why people found him so "interesting", Ted is a far better character, a far more complex man to read about. And while he might not have been the greatest family man, he seems like he was the greatest friend anyone could ever have. Loyal to a fault (which tripped him up in later years) Ted never forgot a kind word and usually paid everyone back ten-fold.

After reading this book, it is apparent to me that Ted Williams led one of the greatest American lives of the last 100 years.

I'm not sure if you remember the book review I wrote a few weeks ago about Nietzsche's "Thus Spoke Zarathustra" and how I tried reading this book about ten years ago and I couldn't do it.

"A Clockwork Orange" was another book that I just couldn't get into when I first bought it eight or nine years ago. I have no idea why I couldn't read these books, yes they're written differently and it takes a bit more concentration to get through them, but it wasn't as if they were written in Mandarin Chinese. But there they were on my bookshelf, mocking me ... ha, ha you're too dumb to read us. Well, I read both of them and I have to say I'm glad. I feel a sense of accomplishment.

Clockwork is written in a sort of half English half-cockney/Eastern European slang language. It takes a chapter or two to really get into the language, but once that happens, the book is fantastic.

The book is just like the movie, the main character's name is Alexander and he is a 15-year-old psychopath that enjoys beating the hell out of people, running stuff over and raping chicks. That is what this dude does every single night. One night he gets busted doing this and is sent to prison. While in prison, he gets an offer to shorten his 15-year sentence to two weeks if he undergoes an experiment.

He figures he'll skate, so he agrees. The problem is that he get brainwashed into relinquishing any aggressive forms of behavior. Whenever he wants to practice some of the old in and out (rape) or ultraviolence (kicking the crap out of people) he gets violently ill. While this may sound like a good idea, it turns out it's made him harmless like a kitten, so he gets his ass kicked by a conga line of people that he screwed over in his past life and there's nothing he can do about it.

Burgess brings up a lot of interesting philosophical points in this book, namely: the subject of free will and free choice, being mindlessly good is not necessarily a good thing, a person does need some sort of mean streak to live in the real world and to what extremes should the government go to "rehabilitate" criminals. Is taking away their right to freedom of thought worse than their original crimes?

And like I said earlier, with the hodgepodge of the language it may be hard to follow so I suggest watching the movie first. Even though Burgess hated it, this is one of my all-time favorites.

So that's it for now, see you on Sunday ... I hope.

Fanning the Comic Flames

Sort of a double entendre there in that title. Actually, not really, well sort of ... in this comic strip Eddie is wearing an Atlanta Flames shirt (coincidently, I have one just like it) and he's wasted and singing the Doors (which, also coincidently, I used to do ... never got beat up for it though, but I bet I almost did).

Atlanta Flames? The Doors? Eddie? What the hell are you talking about? If you have no idea what the heck I'm talking about, go to this link and everything will be as clear as an unmuddied lake www.room19comics.com. BTW, a million bonus points if you can guess where that line about the unmuddied lake came from. Give up? Good old Alexander DeLarge said it in "A Clockwork Orange" ... both in the book and the movie.

We have a subtle change in the format this week, if you notice there are now gutters between panels. This was suggested by a SoSH member, Shoeless Joe. I doubt it was the real Shoeless Joe as he was completely illiterate and dead before the first computer came out, but this Joe knows his stuff. He's an illustrator who is working on his first graphic novel. Check it out here: http://www.donmacdonald.com/

Back to my stuff, I think that the first panel turned out pretty well. It's very plain, sets up the rest of the strip. The thing that makes me laugh about it is the look of naive joy on Eddie's face as he's telling Kurt his idea. With the way Kurt's eyes are being rolled to the back of his head, you can tell that he isn't buying the whole life of the party line.

We've all been there before, haven't we? We're telling a friend or family member our idea of grandeur and they're just looking at you like, "You've got to be kidding me" , but they're too polite to say anything. I think it happens more when you're in high school and college and you're still trying to figure out what makes you tick, but every now and again, it occurs.

In the second panel, Eddie is obviously hammered. You can tell this by the cliched lampshade and the fact that he has two beers in his hand. Originally, I wanted to draw Eddie standing on a couch and have the big burly bouncer guy, just be a pissed off party-goer, but that didn't have the same oomph behind it. Plus, Eddie getting his ass kicked is another example of how reality is far different from preconceptions.

I wrote/drew about this in the second strip found here: http://www.room19comics.com/comic_strip2.htm. BTW, how meta is that?

In the final panel, Eddie is given a sobering (no pun) slap of reality. He's hung over and beaten up. And since Kurt is his best buddy, he's got to twist the knife a little bit. The one thing that I like is that they're back to where they started, Kurt is the same, while Eddie is a bit worse for the wear, but learned a valuable lesson.

So, here's the thing, I've been told that some people don't like the explanation of each strip. I do like it, but if enough people complain, I guess that I'll stop. And it's been a long time since I've written about anything besides the strip. Thursday, that's all going to change. I have a ton of stuff to write: two book reviews, a Sox game review, and just a bunch of other crap. Also, I am going to be on a new Blog service, which I will explain a bit more about on Thursday.

The only thing that I really know about it is that it's Canadian. Expect a lot of "aboots", hockey talk and more manners.

Hey! A Puke Joke!

You can't go wrong with the word "puke" ... that's the thing that made George Costanza laugh. And making George Costanza laugh ain't easy.

I was ambivalent about this strip when I started. I thought that the written idea was ok, but I wasn't sure how I was going to draw it. There are a few bumps in the artistic narrative, but overall I think that I pulled it off.

If you're wondering what the hell I'm talking about, well you just ain't paying attention. Go to www.room19comics.com and soon you'll be knee-deep in laughter.

I think that three of the panels work very well beginning with the first one. Personally, I like strips that begin with nothing ... nothing said, nothing happening in terms of action. Some people might say that is a waste of space, the comic strip is a very finite medium, you have maybe three or four panels to say what you have to say, so you shouldn't throw your real estate away. Normally, I agree with this assessment, but I think that Kurt standing there like it's a regular day sets up the rest of the strip.

The second panel is not very good. Kurt does not have a lot of facial expressions and the one that I was trying to convey (surprise) is not portrayed well here. I wanted to have his eyes bug out of his head, but no matter how I tried, it just wasn't working out. This was the best that I could do. Also, the placement of Kurt is a complete waste of space. There should've been something else in the panel.

As bad as the second panel is, the third panel is just as good. I like Eddie's Dr. Seuss hat, when I penciled it in, it looked sort of crappy, but after some nice pen work (yes, my arm hurts from patting myself on the back) it really came out well. And check out Kurt, I was very pleased with the way I was able to draw his hand going through his hair. I think that this made up for that really crummy second panel.

Also, Eddie is wearing Zubaz pants. Here's the thing, when you're trying to write (or draw) something funny, exaggeration is always key. Do I really think that someone would keep, much less wear, a t-shirt from a 1993 concert or pants from the same era? Probably not. But, I think that it looks pretty good and conveys the horror that is laundry day.

The fourth panel is pretty basic. You get two punchlines actually, so there you go.

Let me ask you a question, does the Blog entry work with the strip? I think that it does as it a. lets me work through some stuff as to why I did certain things and b. it allows you to ... I'm not sure what it allows you to do, but it's a catharsis for me. So unless I hear otherwise, I'm keeping it.

I'm going to try and write a Blog entry some time this week, but I'm not promising anything. Check back early and often.

Ironic and some new Room 19 stuff

Thanks for clicking here again. As you can see, Eddie Verde and his buddies have taken a short vacation. They'll be back next week, but I wanted to interrupt with a strip that I'm going to do from time to time called "Random Memories".

I got the idea for this week's strip from my favorite part of the "Zippy the Pinhead" comic. Basically, Griffey (the cartoonist and writer) takes a break from the normal strange narrative and tells a story from his past. Unlike his normal stuff; this type of strip usually has a beginning, an ending and a linear point to the story.

If you have no idea what the hell I'm talking about, check out my strip here: www.room19comics.com

Not that my main characters follow the absurdist point of view of everyone's favorite Pinhead, I thought that this was a humorous story that wouldn't have the same force if done in today's day and time. Aside from the graffiti scrawl on the board of Holden Caulfield equaling Ross Gellar (the whiney character from Friends), everything about this strip is 100% true.

The professor responsible for the inspiration of this strip was a nice lady (I'm not going to tell you her name and I can't remember the class) but she always tried a bit too hard to "connect" with her students. Like I said in the strip, she had a teenage daughter who either was very, very uncool or pretended to be uncool so that her mother thought that she was a good kid. I couldn't figure it out.

One day, she busted out that nugget about Alanis Morissette and I just about fell off of my chair. For one thing, by the time she said this, Alanis was pretty much played out. It had been seven months since her first song ("You Oughta Know") came out and the backlash was beginning. The first wave are the guys who are sick of hearing drunk sorority chicks singing wailing of jilted lovers through Alanis.

Secondly, the "Ironic" song was being pushed on so many different media, that it was impossible not to hear it. Where ever you were that spring, within 10 minutes you heard that song. Even ardent Alanis supporters had reached their breaking point. So, it was really no surprise that someone as out of touch with popular culture, like my professor, would try to get in good with her students by referencing Ms. Morissette.

Much like when your parents tried to use slang, it went over like a fart in church. Compound that with the fact that she actually liked the lyrics of the song, and you have the makings of a full-fledged meltdown. Here's the thing, I've thought a lot about this song and while most of the lyrics have nothing to do with irony, I wonder if Morissette was being ironic about singing a song about irony that actually had no irony in it. If so, than about 95% of the world missed the point (including my professor).

On the day she said this, I remember saying to my friends as we left, "Can you believe this crap? We pay her to teach us and she doesn't know the first thing about irony." After that, she completely lost the class. No one took her seriously. If she couldn't tell the difference between what's ironic and what's not ironic, how could she possibly explain the hidden intricacies of a text? Her comments on papers and tests were treated as if they were made by a third grader and her classroom comments were also blown off.

Basically the last month of the semester was a complete joke because of this one statement.

As I grew older, I've thought a lot about that day. I have no ill will for Alanis Morissette, when you find out that her first big hit was about Uncle Joey (Dave Coullier) from "Full House", the line "will she go down on you in a theater" is absolutely priceless. Plus, she did a pretty good job on an episode "Curb Your Enthusiasm" and Kevin Smith said she was cool on the set of "Dogma". Plus, since Alanis-mania, she has pretty much settled into the background of pop culture. Kind of hard to hate someone that isn't in the public eye.

As for my professor, like I said before I can't even remember the name of the course, but I do remember a part of her lecture. At least that's something.

BTW, for all you "Arrested Development" fans out there, FOX is running two-hour marathons for the next couple of Fridays. Then it settles into it's new night and time on Monday, September 19 with the season premiere. Just watch it.

Things that go with kidneys?

Kidney beans? Check. A kidney-shaped pool? Ok. Kidney stones? Bad idea. Very bad idea.

Want to know why I think that they're a bad idea? Because I passed one on Saturday night. And it hurt. A lot. I am talking major league pain here. When my buddy Nick got one about a month or so ago, I thought it was sort of humorous (BTW, when I told him about mine he laughed his ass off too) because I thought it was something only old people get or dudes who were wound up way too tight.

Apparently all sorts of people get them. Saturday was supposed to be a kick-ass day, Aly was hanging with her friends and I was going out with Ryan, Tim and Andrew to meet a bunch of SoSHers. Every year a group of people get together, toss a few back and go to a Sox game. I was there to toss a few back and maybe find my way into the Red Sox game.

Around 2:30 it was time to take a shower, but first I had to take a leak. It was bloody. This has always been one of my great fears and I was sort of interested in what my reaction was going to be should the day ever occur. I pretty much was shocked and said, "This doesn't look quite right."

I told Aly and then waited until the next time I had to pee before I called the doctor. Next time I went, it was there again. So off to the telephone I went. The doctor was at a pool party and said that if I do it again, to get up to Anna Jacques and give them a urine sample. Of course, it happened again, so we went to Newburyport.

Good bye SoSH, good bye Aly's friends, good bye drinking. When we got there, Aly and I pretty much figured that I had a urine infection and that was that. I peed in the cup and went to visit my folks. We had a little dinner on the deck and after that I started to get a really searing pain in my right side.

My parents and Aly thought that I was dying or something, so we got into the car and went back to the hospital. Normally, it takes maybe 10 minutes to get to Anna Jacques from my parents' place, but it seemed like it took six hours. When we finally got there they hustled me into the emergency room where I was convulsing a bit and alternating between the sweats and freezing my ass off.

They got me hooked up to an IV where they gave me some fluids and pain killers. I started to feel much better after that. And then it was pretty much over. I sat in the bed for about three hours; got blood taken from me, spoke with a doctor and that was pretty much it.

I apparently passed the stone on the deck because passing the stone doesn't mean passing it out of your body. It means going from your kidney to your bladder. That's where it hurts the most. The doctor told me to call a urologist on Monday and then he sent me home.

Aly and I stayed at my parents' for the night and we were out of there around noon on Sunday. Aside from a bottle of percocets, none of which I've taken, not much has changed. Today, I took Aly to work and when I came home I called the urologist to make an appointment. I mistakenly thought that a passed stone would bump me to the head of the line, but you have to be dying to see this guy.

His office told me I couldn't see him until August 10. That rots because while I'm not in intense pain or anything, my side is a little sore and I wouldn't be surprised if I passed another stone. So, I've been sitting around the house all day bored out of my cotton-picking mind.

I finished my homework. I paid some bills. I watched TV. I read the paper. I tried to nap. I found the last hotel for our honeymoon. I'm writing this Blog and after this I'm going to upload my strip for tomorrow. I never thought that I'd say this, but I'm fucking bored of being at home. Work can't come soon enough.

As bad as my Saturday was, it can't compare to my uncle's Sunday. Last night, my aunt Rita died. She was the last of the old school Pettorutos and will be missed. She hasn't been doing well for a long time (at least 10 years) and it was always sort of a running conversation whether she'd make it to the next big holiday. But every year she was there at our house or Uncle Bud's.

By the end of her time, she really didn't know what was going on and had sunk into a pretty deep state of dementia. I heard from my mom, that she was talking to people who have been dead for decades and it wasn't a pretty site. This, of course, is a huge shame as not only was she the matriach of my family, but she was a leading business woman in the Lawrence for many years.

Rita stood by my uncle Al (her brother) when he ran and ultimately won a state rep's seat and she really put her parents' store on the map with a lot of broad ideas that were considered revolutionary in her day. She always had time for Jason and I and I'm going to miss her very much. But, to be honest with you, even though she physically left us yesterday, she had been gone for a long time.

MTV and the Renaissance?

There are a few words that you never expect to see side-by-side in the English language: funny and Jimmy Fallon, tasteful and Gene Simmons and the renaissance and MTV. In this new comic strip, I was trying to show that the more things change, the more they stay the same ... or something like that.

If you are completely clueless to what I'm talking about, boogie on over to www.room19comics.com. It's the site that a handful of people are talking about.

In any event, this is the comic strip that I wrote about it Friday's Blog. A quick aside, this is a Blog that I wrote at work and was not able to post (read: I was too tired and/or forgetful to post on Friday night) on the comic strip page. So, if you haven't seen it, it's new to you. (BTW, that was a terrible catch phrase that NBC used a few years ago to hype the summer reruns.)

This is the strip, after a few weeks of four panels, I dropped back down to three. Basically this was the first half of my last semester at Merrimack. I need a few more classes to get my minor in visual arts and one was Art II with Professor Longwood. She was a ball breaker. For an hour and a half every class you'd see nothing but slides. This would go on for six weeks. Each test was five slides and we had to tell the name of the painting, who painted it, when they painted it and an explanation of the painting.

Things weren't so bad until you hit the Renaissance. It seemed like everyone and their brother was painting the Madonna and child. There had to be about 30 paintings of this subject, all in similar positions. It was torture going through and differentiating which was which.

That is the situation that our hero Eddie finds himself in. I think that the first panel came out ok. He's sitting at his desk, there are a ton of books around, he's studying hard. Eagle-eye watchers of Room 19 will notice that this is also the first time that the other side of Eddie's face is shown. Normally it looks like it does in the third panel, but I wanted to show some depth.

The second panel sucks. It has a ton of wasted space. While there are just as much art in the second as the first, there is a ton of text which a. sets up the joke and b. shows the gravity of his studies. In the second panel, there is an interesting shot of Ed rubbing his eyes, but nothing else. I wasted about a third of a panel. Not good.

The third panel delivers with the punch line. Not very joke-y per se, but it's more of how no matter how you try to get away from something, it's probably going to find you somewhere. Believe it or not, that stupid TV stand took me a long-ass time to draw. I really wanted to get the perspective correct.

BTW, there were two loose ends I had to tie up from the last entry. One, Alex Cora ended up hitting into a 6-2-3 double play (about the only way that the Sox couldn't have scored a run) and I got to meet Sam Horn last Sunday. I think I told you about SoSH having a get-together that day, well I went and I won a t-shirt. Big Sam was there and I was asked if I wanted it autographed.

I really didn't, but I didn't want to hurt the dude's feelings. It's not that I thought he sucked or anything, far from it -- when I was a kid I thought he was going to be the next big thing, I just liked the shirt too much for it to be written on. I told him he could and now I have a big "SAM HORN" on my new white shirt. Ah well, such is life.

The funny thing about Sam is that he's a huge dude and he has a pretty big appetite. When I saw him he was sitting in front of a pile of buffalo wing bones. There had to be about 40 of them on the plate. Good for you, Horny.

Looking at some movies and a crappy week

Here's the deal with the Blog, I'm not updating it as much as I should. I know what you're thinking, "How can I live without my 19Thoughts? I shall surely die of ignorance." All I can say to you, is, "Can it Mr. Sarcasm." This truly has been a very trying week and I'm lucky that I can write this one.

How trying, let me tell you on Saturday we finished up the wedding hall crap with my parents and Aly's parents. After a two-hour meeting with the Longwood manager, I felt like I had gone 12 rounds with Tyson. I was tired, confused and in need of booze.

Sunday, I tried something new, I thought it would be a good idea to watch the Sox play the Yanks and draw at the same time. Needless to say I was pissed off squared. It took me a long ass time to do my strip, when it shouldn't have and the Sox lost with some dumb-assed managing in the ninth. Francona left Alex Cora in to bat against Mariano Rivera with no outs, bases loaded and the Sox down by two because, are you ready for this, he "wanted to see Cora hit."

What the fuck? Are you serious? Take him to Route 1 in Saugus and give him a couple of quarters for the batting cage. After that you can play mini golf and eat ice cream. John Olerud is on your bench for a reason. This is officially my first "WTF is Tito thinking of?" moment of the year.

Oh yeah, our limo guy calls out of no where and reverses his prices on us. Thanks dick at Boston Limo. You can suck it.

Monday, I came into work and the air conditioner over my head is leaking. It started on Saturday and hadn't stopped. Thus everything at my desk is completely wet. After lunch another leak opens up over my head. I try to work with an umbrella over my desk but no luck.

At night, I try to scan in my new strip (not the crappily drawn one) and I have a complete brain fart about how to size it. It takes me an hour and a half and it's all fucked up.

Tuesday I come into work and there are now three leaks and everything is wet. I offer to go home, but I am moved to a new cube. It also smells like someone took a gigantic piss in the middle of my cube. After work is school. I started a new class in Illustrator, which looks like it's going to be pretty fun.

Except I don't think my teacher realizes that we all have work and other shit to do as he assigns us, six hours (yes SIX) of making belizer (spelling?) curves, read and complete Chapter 4 and begin our project. Guess what I'm doing on Sunday.

When I get home I finally figure out how shrink down my strip (took me 15 minutes) and reload the page. While there is a technical glitch or two, I am in bed by midnight after seeing a mouse run by me in our living room. Fucking sweet.

Wednesday, it's still hot as balls out, did I tell you it's been 90 degrees every day with like 98% humidity? If all of these little things didn't conspire to stress me out, the heat certainly pushed me over the edge. Aly and I get into an argument, I got to bed at 12:30 and wake up at 4:30, because I can't put this kind of shit to bed. I obsess and toss and turn. This is one of the reasons why I hate fighting.

The other is because I'm so fucking stupid and competitive, I always go for the throat. I'm not a good fighter because a lot of the times, I'm just a dick. In any event, Aly and I make up Thursday morning and things are looking better. Aside from some minor work things, Friday hasn't been too bad.

This past weekend, I ended up seeing two movies. Saturday, Jamie and I went to see "The Fantastic Four". I've already admitted to you guys that I'm a comic geek at heart. I love the stuff, even though I tell most people that I don't. Spider-man, X-Men, Batman, it's all good. Some of the most fun I've had in a theatre in the last three years.

While FF doesn't exactly live up to those three, it's a pretty good movie. Some of the origins are changed (like Dr. Doom and the FF were colleagues who were both in the spaceship) but it did a decent job in keeping with the mythology. A lot of people crabbed about the special effects, but I thought they were good as well.

One reviewer from the Globe said that this movie should've been more "erotic" I have zero clue what the hell he meant. I guess it would've been funny to see Mr. Fantastic take a piss from a different room, but that's sort of gay isn't it? In any event, I bet they have a sequel since it opened up well ($56 million in the first weekend).

The second flick I saw was "Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith". Awesome. Very, very good. Yes, it's a cliche to say that the first two were stupid and while I won't go that far, they were a bit of a disappointment. This movie did not disappoint.

A wookie army, a bunch of lightsabre fights, dead Jedis all over the place, definitely a fine film. There were a lot of things that I liked, such as when Ben delivered Luke to Uncle Owen and Aunt Baru and Owen is looking at the two suns. Shot for shot, that was like the introduction to Luke Skywalker in the Episode IV.

Also, it was cool to see that Yoda and Chewbacca were buddies from way back. I always thought that it was dumb luck that Chewy and Han got together to fight the Empire. Now I can reasonably say that Chewy was the brains of that duo. He probably made Han go to Tatoine and find Obi Wan and then forced him to go back to knock Vader's ass off of Luke's tail so he could blow up the Death Star.

I really want to get the six-DVD set when it comes out and just watch it straight through. The one thing I'll say is that when I was a kid, I always assumed that the Star Wars trilogy was always going to be about Luke and how he went from a pussy farm boy to a pussy Jedi. Now I know, it was really a story about Darth Vader.

If you think about it, that's quite a 180. It's like finding out the Superman story was about Lex Luthor or Spider-Man was about the Green Goblin.

The Best ... So Far

This might be a quick entry because it's late and I'm hungry. This comic that you see before you is my favorite one I've done so far. I know I sound like I'm being arrogant, but I'm not, I just really was inspired to write and draw this one.

And for those of you who don't know, go to the July 4th entry in this Blog to find out the real story. This, and this is actually the first time I've ever got to say this, is based on a true event. Just goes to show that inspiration can strike anywhere, even on a T subway.

And for those of you on my Blog who don't know what the hell I'm talking about, go to www.Room19comics.com

There are a few things that I really like about this strip and a couple things I don't. Let's start with the things I dig. In the first panel, I like the woman bumping into each other and I like how Eddie has eyes closed and is just spacing out while listening to his tunes. You can sort of tell that something is about to happen.

BTW, all three of these dudes have on shirts that I actually own. The guy in the 24 shirt (a shout out to my favorite drama) was supposed to be black, but the shading didn't come out correctly ... thank God for Photoshop.

The second panel was an experiment. I wanted to see if I could do something a bit different, but I wanted to get my point across at how bitchy this lady was. I think I did a pretty good job in that. The one part of this panel that I'm a bit discouraged with is the eye balls ... she looks like the Ghost Rider or something.

BTW, this is what the Ghost Rider looks like:

Her eyes are just too damn dark. I guess that's one of the hazards of doing a strip in black and white. There aren't many shades of gray.

I really like the third panel because the expression of Eddie's face and the gigantic question mark popping out of the panel. This is the first strip I've done where he was the straight man and said nothing. Usually Kurt supplies that role, but I think that Eddie did a good job with it.

The one thing I don't like about this panel is the back of the woman's body. Her hair is sort of messed up and I think that I made her too fat.

The fourth panel is ok, stylistically it's sort of flat compared to the other three, but in a way, I think that it works. I really wanted her to stand out to the reader with her missive about people not being polite. To make it a bit more powerful, I decided not to have anything in the background. Does it work? I'm not 100% sure, I'll leave that to you to decide.

BTW, this is the first time that I've drawn a woman in my strip. To be honest, I have a lot of trouble drawing the female form, but this one was pretty easy, because she was so dang lumpy. Nothing like a woman who looks like walking mashed potatoes.

Speaking of potatoes, I'm getting something to eat.

Reviews from everywhere

I gots movie reviews, book reviews and the review of an up and down first half for the 2004 World Series Boston Red Sox.

Let's start with the Sox first, because I'm almost a week late with it. The Sox finished the first half with a 49-38 record, which was one game better than last year. The did this without Curt Schilling (he pitched three games, and did so poorly because of an injury), one of the worst bullpen in the majors and not a lot of production from their second baseman.

The fact that they are in first place by a game is a minor miracle, which leads to the question: are the Red Sox overachieving or is the rest of the division underachieving? The rest of the American League East all have questions, the Orioles have no starters (unless they play the Sox), the Yanks have a crappy outfield defense and no pitching, the Blue Jays are the Hartford Whalers of the AL (forever mediocre) and the Devil Rays are the Devil Rays.

Are the Sox merely the cream of the crap or do they have a legit shot at winning the Series again? Since it's only July 17, it's hard to tell, but they need one thing in order to make me feel better about their chances: a bullpen. With Foulke out until mid-August after getting surgery on his knee (which supposedly has bothered him since he was a White Sox), the rest of the pen has to step it up a bit. Just about everyone has spit the bit. Embree has been horrible, Halama pitches well once a week and Mantei was a disaster (and is out for the year). The only two guys that manager Terry Francona has any confidence in is the two Mikes: Myers and Timlin.

Myers is a situational lefty who can't go more than an inning and while the numbers suggest that Timlin is having a solid year, it may be a mirage as he is allowing a lot of inherited runners to score. From the evidence, it seems that he is a guy that can not come into innings any more, as his ERA is microscopic when he starts one.

If the bullpen is that bad, than the offense is the good. Actually strike that last sentence, the offense is great. Forget Foxx and Williams; Yaz and Harrelson; Rice and Lynn and Cooper and Plantier (the last one is much easier to forget), Manny Ramirez and David Ortiz could be the greatest one-two punch that the Red Sox have ever had.

Manny started off the year slow and the media mavens were saying that he didn't care anymore and that he was "obviously distracted". I wish I could be so distracted at my job. He posted .275/.365/.557 with 23 dingers and 83 runs batted in. Ortiz has slumped for about a week, if you could call it that, and has .308/.388/.584 with 23 homers and 82 RBIs. These are incredible numbers that most people would be pumped to have for the season. There is still about 75 games left to play, it's astounding to think of what they can do.

And as good as the 3-4 punch has been, Johnny Damon has been just as tremendous. He's in the midst of a 28-game hitting streak and an argument can be made that he is the MVP of the American League, especially when you factor his defense into the equation. Jason Varitek, Trot Nixon and Bill Mueller have proven that they're worth their contracts with numbers that are close (if not better) than their career averages.

Nixon, in particular, has started to show Francona that he has shaken the boondoggle of lefties, as he's hitting .270 against them. Not bad numbers for a guy who couldn't touch southpaws in his previous ten years.

All of these offensive fireworks have been more impressive considering that their big offseason signing, Edgar Renteria, has looked as if he has not been comfortable since day one. I know nothing about the guy, so I won't speculate on the reasons for his struggles both at the plate and, most surprisingly, in the field, but I have to think it takes a while to get used to coming from over from the National League. I expect him to heat up in the second half the more acclimated he becomes to his surroundings.

The less said about Kevin Millar the better.

Led by Matt Clement, the starters have been ok. David Wells has been inconsistent, Tim Wakefield has been Tim Wakefield, there are some days when Bronson Arroyo looks like a world beater and other days where it seems he'd rather be at the Paradise rock club strumming his guitar. As an owner of Wade Miller in a fantasy league, he's been driving me crazy, but as a fifth starter, he's been ok.

The main thing that the Sox have to do is get Curt Schilling back to his workhorse form and leading this rotation. Even over finding bullpen arms, this is the most important issue facing the team in the upcoming months. If they can do this and get Keith Foulke back into the groove, the Sox will be the team to beat in the American League.

If not, then it looks like a long summer.

I finished this book, or at least a major part of it, earlier this week:

This collection had most of his writings and the one that I chose was his seminal "Thus Spoke Zarathusra".

First a little background on why I chose this: I've already told you about the dude I used to work with who turned me on to the ideas of Nietszche, when I finally got into college I wanted to learn all that I could about the German philosopher, so I took an 19th Century German Philosophy class with my buddy Archie. I was way over my head in this class, I was the only person who wasn't a philosophy major and I wasn't used to the writing.

Needless to say Hegel, Kierkegaard and Schopenhaur read like they were written in Chinese. The one thing that kept me in the class is the syllabus said that we were going over Nietzsche, but we never did. Because of his countrymen, it spooked me from reading "TSZ" because I thought that I'd never understand it.

Turns out I had completely psyched myself out, for while it wasn't "Nails" by Lenny Dykstra, it wasn't as incomprehensible as I originally thought. Sure, there were some rough spots and some contexts that I probably glazed over, but for the most part the message came through loud and clear.

While I am glad that I read it, I don't think that you can give this book a grade per se, I am more glad that I conquered this mountain myself.

I'm going to the movies in about 20 minutes, so I am going to wait until later in the week to review "The Fantastic Four" (which I saw yesterday) and the new "Star Wars" (which I am going to finally see soon).

Don't forget Wednesday, a new strip ... and if I may be so bold, it's the best one (art wise) that I've done so far.

Montville, Movies and a Mohel

This is going to be a pretty long post, so you better strap yourself in, I have a lot to say.

First up, last Thursday I went to the Brookline Booksmith and got to meet a true giant in the sportswriting business, Leigh Montville. He's always been sort of a hero of mine from when he was writing for the Globe, but mostly when he was at Sports Illustrated.

He spoke before about 20 of us about his new book about the 2004 Sox and he took a bunch of questions. Some of the more interesting answers that he gave was that he hates sports radio, Curt Schilling isn't well liked in the Sox clubhouse (and probably lost some points for tonight) and that the Ted Williams biography (which I bought) was supposed to be a year's worth of work and 100,000. It turned into 2 years worth of work and 200,000 words.

I asked him about Sports Illustrated and the differences between working there and the Globe. Basically, he said that working at SI sucked. Too political and they would hack up all of his stories as it went through FOUR editors. He said by the time they finished up, it was nothing like what he turned in.

Of course he mentioned that he was there for 12 years, so it couldn't have been that bad.

I also asked him about the "new media", Blogs and web sites. He said that it's something that one should keep their eye on, but he doesn't know much about it. All in all, he was a real nice guy and he had a bunch of terrific stories.

Saturday morning, Aly and I woke up bright and early to go to New York and witness the briss of Tyler Jack Cole, Danna and Rick's newborn son. I had never seen a briss and while I was sort of squeemish about the experience, I sort of wanted to see what it was all about.

We made it to the party, but we missed the ceremony. There was a nightmare of a traffic jam on the Tappen Zee bridge, but according to Danna's brother Evan, it was probably a good thing that we missed it. "There was blood every where," he said. "I almost puked."

We hung out there for the better part of the day and then turned around and went home at about 4:00. I was really beat and wanted to sleep in my own bed that night and besides, I had a ton of homework to do. My last Photoshop class was on Tuesday and I had to finish my project.

I really enjoyed working with this program. It's odd because in the middle of class, things just started to come to me. It's almost as if a light went in my head and I really started to put together everything that my teacher was saying. While I'm not Photoshop expert, I do think I can more than hold my own when it comes to doing this stuff.

Next week we're going to begin Adobe Illustrator. I have no idea what that does, should be a lot of fun.

I meant to tell you that I got my first web site gig. Let me first say, I don't know crap about putting up web sites, that begins in the fall, but I contacted the Boston Braves Historical Society and they want me to do their site. I talked to a guy, Mike Fine, who was really cool. He said that he's been looking for someone to do this for them, but with their membership (a lot of older guys) no one really has the skills to do it.

So I am going to do it for them and have it as my final project. I can't wait, I have a great idea for what to do. I am really pumped about it.

Over the Fourth of July weekend, Aly and I saw a couple of movies, one really good and the other one ... not so great.

The first one we saw was Batman Begins. That was awesome. It told the tale of Batman and how he came to be, especially his training. For a closet comic book geek like myself, this was manna from heaven. The scenes of Bruce Wayne in Tibet (really it was filmed in Iceland) at Ra's Al Goul's training facility were tremendous. Great fight scenes and just a cool overall feeling to flick.

Besides RAG, the Scarecrow was a tremendous villain. For a long time there were a bunch of rumors that Howard Stern was going to play him. Cillian Murphy blew him out of the water. He was really that good. Also, Christian Bale (who was really good in 'American Psycho') did a nice job as Batman. The one complaint was his voice when he was the Caped Crusader. A little hacky.

There were a few sort of rough patches: the casting of Katie Holmes as the "tough, no nonsense DA". Really a stretch as Aly said, "She's just playing Joey Potter as a 'Law & Order' character." Also the fighting scenes in the city were very hurky jerky, it was very tough to tell what the hell was happening.

I believe they are doing a sequel and it's going to be great, I bet.

The next night, it was lady's choice, so we went to see "Bewitched". To be honest, I went of my own free will because though I wasn't a big fan of the original TV series, I like Will Ferrel a lot and spending two hours looking at Nicole Kidman, well I can think of worse ways to spend my time. Plus there was a Daily Show feel to the flick as Stephen Colbert, Steve Carrell and Mo Rocca all had parts in it.

Unfortunately, it was a dud. The first half was pretty good, but it went down hill very quickly. Kidman made an interesting choice in playing her character is a complete retard. I'm not sure why she did that.

And the ending came right out of leftfield. It just happened without any explanation. It wasn't a complete waste, as there were some funny Ferrel scenes, but between this and Ferrel's last movie (Kicking and Screaming), he's going to have to come up with something better ... or at least read the scripts.

Some time this weekend, I'm going to post my Red Sox midseason report card. It's a damn good thing I wasn't grading after this crapfest, they all would've flunked.

Finally, A New Strip

Ok, I've been a bit laxed in my Blog entries, but I've been really busy. You'll find out on Thursday when I post a mega-Blog.

But today is all about the comic strip. This is the first one that I scanned in and uploaded myself. If I had to grade this, I'd give it a B or a B-. There are a few things that I don't like, but for the most part, I think I did a pretty passable job. Especially considering I'm using a program that's at least five years out of date.

If you have no idea what the hell I'm talking about go here: www.room19comics.com

Anyway, this strip features Kurt and Eddie chillin' at the bus stop. And Eddie starts talking about his older brother who seems to be into the whole music scene. Like any aging hipster, Eddie's brother is raging against newer music. Why? Who knows, why does anyone hate music that has a "2" in front of the copywrite date?

There's a lot of people like Eddie's brother in the world today, myself included, who think that music topped out when they were in their formative years. And while grunge dudes like myself are bad, no one loves themselves like a baby boomer.

Ask a BB when the earth was created and most will say around 1947. Ask them about "classic" eras in sport, music, television, movies, literature, anything and wouldn't you know that they were young throughout all of these eras. Never mind that the number one song of 1967 (the Summer of Love) was the Archie's "Sugar, Sugar" or that the number one TV show of that era was "The Beverly Hillbillies".

I'm not trying to crack on these folks, because you hear and see a lot of this stuff, not so much from people who went to high school and college in the 70s and 80s, but the other two decades most definitely. I'm sure it has nothing to do with the fact that most of the kids in the 90s were sons and daughters of the children of the 60s.

But getting back to the comic, Eddie calls these people out, and while I wanted to use language a bit more salty, I abstained. After all, this is a family strip.

Ok, I'll talk to you on Thursday ... then I'll have a story about a former Globe columnist, a bris and two movies. If that doesn't whet your appetite, I'm afraid nothing will. And this weekend, I'll give you my Sox midseason report.

A comic culled from my past

Aren't you the lucky little monkeys? Two Blog entries in two days. The reason why yesterday's never made it to the comic page is because I was in Franklin and Aly's dad doesn't have Dreamweaver. So, if you want a cool story about me yelling at a fat lady and read Aquaman's latest, go a bit past this entry.

New cartoon is up today. It's a pretty good one if I do say so myself. And if you still aren't hip to the radical new web site taking America by storm, go to www.room19comics.com and become a true believer.

The title of this Blog says it all, this is actually a story from my sorted past. When I was in college I had a roommate named Bob. He's a good guy, pretty smart, super laid back, smoked more grass than anyone I knew, but never really let it affect him. Bob was from northern New Hampshire and besides being a bit of a hillbilly, all of his friends went to "Good Old State U", otherwise known as the University of New Hampshire.

One of Bob's best friends was a dude named Thomps. Thomps was the type of guy who'd tell you the exact opposite of what you'd expect to hear because he wanted you to either argue with him or admire his "brazen" attitude. Unfortunately for Thomps he was full of shit and wouldn't choose the right subjects to be a contrarian about. One of these things was his view on the weather.

Thomps proudly told anyone who walked by that he wears shorts until the first snow fall. It could be 21 degrees with a wind chill of 2 and he'd be strutting around in his cargo shorts wondering what everyone was looking at. He loved the attention, but since it's really not that big of a deal, most of the time people ignored him. This lead to him asking "Wanna know why I'm wearing shorts?"

As you can tell, very lame.

I didn't want Eddie to be lame, the way I picture him, he's a dreamer and from time to time finds himself trapped in the (recent) past. When he gets made to come into the real world, it often hits him like a bucket of cold water. So there's a lesson to be learned here, don't live in the past.

There are two things you should notice about this strip, one: it's a four-panel one. That makes the site a bit compact. Once I figure out how to resize it, it'll be ok. The other is, look at Kurt's jacket. I purposely made it grow larger with each panel to sort of drive home how cold it is and how foolish Eddie looks in a spring jacket.

On Thursday I'm coming back with another Blog entry, I'm going to review a couple movies I saw this weekend and we can talk about some other stuff too. Talk to you then.

A funny story and some Q and A's with Aquaman

This was going to simply be a question and answer Blog with the Prince of the Deep, Aquaman, but a funny thing happened to Aly and I yesterday on the T. We were heading into Government Center to sample the Chowderfest (long story short, we got there, the lines were waaaaay too long so we went to Pizzeria Regina instead) and instead of taking the car we jumped on the T. The Sox were playing at 2:00 and we got on around 1, so the train was packed. At the very next stop, this fat lady in a tie-dyed shirt starts busting her way out of the train. She's screaming and yelling, but people can only move so fast because the train is absolutely packed. Finally she yells at Aly, "Get out of the way! Are you so lazy that you can't move two steps?" First of all, Aly was moving, it's just that there was a half dozen people in front of her, so I look at the lady and say, "Hey Tubby, cram it." And then she said, "What did you say?" and I told her again. She then went on a rant about how it wasn't nice to say something like that, only she was screaming. Finally I told her to take a walk because it looked like she could use it. Then she gave me the bird and continued to yell at me. At that point, I just smirked and waved goodbye, because the conductor shut the door and we left. Here's the thing, I don't really feel good about what I did (though it was funny that I called her Tubby), but at the same time, she was being an obnoxious bitch, who is she to yell at Aly? Sometimes, people can be real assholes. And speaking of a real asshole, here's Aquaman with his first ever question and answer column: Thanks, Byron. If you ever call me an asshole again there will be a school of piranah in your toilet next time you sit down to take a piss ... that's how the girls do it, right? Anyway, I got a bunch of letters from my fans over the last year about super heroes and stuff, so since I'm an expert, I'm going to answer them for you. And if you don't like the answers, maybe you're asking the wrong questions. First one: Aquaman, Who would win in a fight between the Thing and the Hulk? Sincerely, Steven Rogers Dumb question Steve. For one thing, if they fought in the water, I'd kick both of their asses with one arm tied behind my back. How many times do I have to tell you that the Earth is made up of 75% water and I'm the toughest dude there? I mean, the Thing is made of orange rocks. The Hulk is a brainless idiot. One sinks, the other stinks. End of story. Yo AM, Who would win in a race between the Flash and Superman. Both are wicked fast. Your bud, Vinnie Favale Vinnie, you're a turd and no bud of mine. First Steve asks about two mouthbreathers and now you. What the fuck? Like the previous question, if these two were having a race in the water, the obvious answer is that I'd win. And BTW, do you know how the Flash got his name? Ask his girlfriend. Wocka, wocka. Hi Aquaman, Long time, first time here. Your arch enemy is a guy named Black Manta. Black Vulcan is an African American, Black Panther is too, are you fighting him because you're a racist? Why don't you just let him be himself? Also, do you like porcelin dolls, because I do. O'Shea Jackson I'll take your last question first, of course I don't like porcelin dolls. Although that does remind me of a rumor I heard this weekend, do you know that Ice Cube was kicked out of NWA because he collected porcelin dolls? It's true. Apparently Eazy-E found out, started ragging on him and off he left. Drag that something like that ended one of the greatest rap acts of all time. For the more serious question: no, I am not a racist.  Aquaman, Why aren't you on the new Justice League cartooon any more? All of the other heroes are, even Elastic Man. Are you a bigger pussy than Elastic Man? Reed Richards No. I could kick that guy's ass, if he came under the sea. The reason why I'm not on the new Justice League cartoon is because those guys at Cartoon Network are the biggest bunch of cheapskates on the planet. Listen, I'm an original SuperFriend, I don't work for scale. If they want me, they better pay me Superman or Batman money. None of this Apache Chief cash. And confidentially, Apache Chief only takes beaver pelts and booze in exchange for work. Weird system he has going on there. Hey big boy, What would you say to a little Giganta action? G. Ganta I'd say get an air tank and get that big ass of yours down here ... you're not the only thing that grows when you get excited! And that's about it for Q and A with the Big A. Next time, I'll have more answers for your questions.

Where were you 368 days ago?

It was a little over a year ago that I started this little blog and I'm still here. Whether that is a good or not, I'll leave that up to you, but I never thought that I'd do it. While not the most significant anniversary in the world, it really means a lot to me: 368 days, 112 posts, thousands of words (some actually are spelled correctly and combine with others to make a decent thought), not too bad.

Thank you for reading and indulging in my written insanity.

During the last year a lot of things have changed: I moved from Somerville to Brookline, I went from being single to engaged, I don't hate my job as much, I'm in school and I have a brand new website, (excuse me, a little net whoring: click here). Things are looking good.

Today is the Saturday of the Fourth of July weekend, we aren't doing jackshit. It's a gorgeous day out and I'm sitting in here writing and after that I'll probably work on my strip for a bit. I have to start pulling together a list of people that I want to see my strip (that dude that I met at Johana's wedding, and the cartoonist whom I spoke to in November, Sara's friend) and find some websites where I can link my site.

Truth be told, I haven't been getting a lot of hits on the comic and if I want things to grow a bit, I'm going to need more eyeballs. Ryan suggested that I work on putting up two strips a week, but I can't do that now, with work, school, the wedding, trying to go to the gym, there are just too many things. Plus, I want to start with a solid base and work on meeting my self-imposed deadlines. You'd be surprised how quick a week goes by when you need to post things.

I finished another book, one that I bought on Saturday. Buzzed through it in about three days, which isn't any big shakes as I'll explain in a moment. Anyway, here is the libro:

First off, I am a gigantic Kevin Smith fan, for those that don't know, he is the writer/director of "Clerks", "Mallrats", "Chasing Amy", "Dogma", "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" and "Jersey Girl". I never saw the last movie, but the first five are tremendous. If you haven't seen them, get out and rent them, especially "Clerks".

I've seen countless interviews with the guy and he seems like a real solid dude, no pretentsion at all. He was a working stiff who made and financed "Clerks" with loans and credit cards and it turned out to be a huge hit. Another thing that I like about him is that he seems to have never forgotten a friend or where he came from. To me that's pretty important.

Having said all of that, there were a few problems I had with the book. One he used my old college trick of making a book or a report or essay look more impressive than it really is. He (or more rightly, his publisher) jacked up the type and squished the margins (all fucking four, that's pretty ballsy) in. The book was about 300 pages, but in reality, it was maybe 140. But in order to justify charging $14.00 for it, I guess they had to make it longer. Whatever, not a huge deal.

This fault is mostly mine, but I had read a good portion of his essays on line. He has an awesome web page that has a Blog and a message board where he chats with fans. Personally, I think that's the balls when someone whom many people respect take time out of their busy schedule to check in with little guys and gals. Here it is, if you're curious: View Askew.

So that sucks for me.

The third thing is that aside from a vicious cut job on Reese Witherspoon, Smith really doesn't deliver the goods as far as gossip. He's a cocktease about it, writing that he heard some cool shit, but he never delivers. I understand why he can't, but it still sucks. Also, he shouldn't be allowed to interview anyone. He sits down with Ben Affleck (whom I like) and Tom Cruise (whom I think is a total tool) and as I was reading it, I actually felt embarrassment. Sure, it's cool to fawn all over your idols, but this was a bit much.

But in the long run he's a writer, not a journalist (that's his wife), and when he writes, he's magnificent. Just some great observations on pop culture, some cool behind the scenes on his movies and how Hollywood really works. I thought that the best parts is when he detailed his regular life. Like I said, I like Smith a lot, he seems like a dude who I would really like to hang with and this book didn't do anything to change that.

I've been sort of putting doing these things off, especially since I started the strip, but I want you to look at this comic strip:



To say that I was surprised when I read this is an understatement, I think someone has kidnapped Johnny Hart and replaced him with Zach De La Rocha. Johnny has always peppered his strips with very strong Christian and pro-American rhetoric for as long as I can remember. And this is a direct shot at the U.S. government, or at least an unofficial part of the law making process.

And in calling lobbyists bribers, he's heavily insinuating that congressmen and senators are actually taking that bribe. And if we go a step further, if the lobbyists have our government in their pockets, that means our country is being controlled by big business.

Not exactly apple pie, mom and baseball, is it? And two days before our nation's birthday! You've got balls, Mr. Hart.

I have to admit, I like it. I really do, not that I think that the United States is run by Big Business, I think it is, but I'm glad that someone like Hart is thinking the same thing. Next thing you know, Bill Keane is going to be asking for "blood in the streets" and Jim Davis will stop railing against Mondays and starting screaming for the impeachment of George W.

Has the world gone Ted Rall on us?

BTW, I won't be in Brookline for the rest of the weekend, I'm going to try and post an Aquaman Blog sometime, but the computer that I'll be near still has a dial-up connection. We'll see how it goes. Have a Happy Fourth, everyone and congratulations to Danna and Rick on the birth of their first child. Mozltov.