If you get that pun, you’re about as big of a comic book geek as I am. One of my favorite books when I was a kid was Alpha Flight, which was about a band of Canadian superheroes, that were put together by their government. Alpha Flight was the varsity, Gamma Flight were the freshman team and Beta Flight was the JV squad. Their arch enemies were Omega Flight.
Anyhow, after promising you last week that I was done with the Meta stuff, it looks as if I did it again. The reason? It was well-received by the folks over at SoSH. An avalanche of support (two posts) came in and said that they wanted more post modern strips. Who am I to give the finger to my only two fans?
This week I decided to rip a story from this week’s headlines about the use of steroids and a certain baseballer who hit his 715, passing the “white guy”. Yes sir, that lovable scamp Barry Bonds had us glued to our televisions, radios, computers and CBs hoping and praying that he’d finally pass the Babe. I don’t think I can recall a time where our nation has been pulled closer together … this is probably what the country would feel like if 9/11, Pearl Harbor and the Christmas of 1984 (the year I got Castle Grayskull and a bunch of He-Man stuff) all happened on the same day.
Poor Byung Yung Kim, he had to be the sacrificial lamb and give up Mr. Lovable’s second place shot. Hey, it sucks for Kim, but awesome for America! Go America! USA! USA! USA! Is BK’s record breaking pitch some sort of Babe Ruth curse? I don’t know, but if rearrange the spelling of his name you get something weird. I’ll let the Boston Globe’s Dan Shaughenessy take care of that.
What am I talking about? Feast your eyes on this, jerkstores: www.room19comics.com
That was a long preamble to what the site is about, my comic strip. This week, I decided that Eddie was going to take steroids and get absolutely huge so he could dominate waffle ball. Notice the size of his arms and head. That’s the tell-tale sign of a roid-freak. At least that’s what I’ve heard on sports radio. In any event, he’s ripped and his shirt is very tight. Plus, he’s wearing American flag pants.
Have you ever been to the gym and noticed the ultra-serious weight lifters look as if they forgot to buy clothes after 1993. Zubaz pants, pants with designs that shouldn’t be on them (like American flags), ripped t-shirts, spaghetti tank tops. I mean, really, what the fuck? Is it that hard to buy a t-shirt or a pair of shorts? And the weird thing is all of these dudes congregate together, so they sort of look normal. It’s when you take one of these freaks out of their natural habitat that they start to look like the morons that they really are.
After Kurt tells Eddie that he sucks, that’s when the Meta madness begins; first with a shot across the bow at me. That bastard called me lazy. Actually, I called myself lazy, because it’s true. I don’t think that I’m ever going to get the “time” I need to get this strip off the ground, so I should probably stop waiting around for it and start making the time I need to get things moving. Quick aside, this weekend Aly’s brother John and his family came up from Atlanta. He’s a writer and was telling me about how he starts correspondences with other writers about the books that they’ve written, etc.
Granted, he has an in (he wrote an awesome book about a year ago), but what’s stopping me from doing something like this with either other writers or other cartoonists? Nothing really. In fact, with the ultranet, it should be ten times easier to talk to people and share ideas. He inspired me to this, so this weekend wasn’t too bad. Just for the record, even though it was a long weekend, I didn’t do a hell of a lot. Everyone was up and we just hung out with them and the two kids. Pretty relaxing, yet I felt warn out this morning.
Back to the strip, Kurt assures Eddie that things will be back to normal next week and sure enough he peels back the paper that reveals next week’s strip and he’s right. Things are back to normal. This week’s strip came to me on the precipice of falling asleep so I wasn’t sure a. if I’d remember it and b. if it was going to turn out ok. I glad that I did remember it, because I think that it turned out real well. I think I did a good job with the art and I didn’t over write it like I have been doing.
That’s the one thing that I have to watch … know when the joke is over. For example, in last week’s strip, I should’ve just ended it with Kurt saying, “You should just say shit, it’s easier.” But I had to try and go a step further. The strange thing is I know that it was too much, but my buddy on SoSH (Shoeless Joe) confirmed it. Plus, Aly says that I’ve been too wordy lately too. She suggests that I go back and touch things up by editing them. I just might do that.
Last Wednesday, Brownie got us tickets to Pearl Jam at the TD Banknorth Garden. It was one of the better concerts I’ve seen since the last concert I’d been too, also Pearl Jam which was also at the Garden. They played for an incredible two and a half hours, and I don’t care who you are, that is a mammoth show.
Were there some down times? Yeah. But like I said, it was two and a half hours, give these guys a break. I’ve now seen them five times (I’m doing an EXTREMELY geeky project on this, which you people will bear witness to soon) and each time they have delivered. This was their set list:
Set 1 Release, Severed Hand, World Wide Suicide, Corduroy, Animal, Red Mosquito, Love Boat Captain, Better Man, Unemployable, Even Flow, Sad, Wishlist, Gone, Green Disease, Down, Jeremy, Life Wasted, Why Go
Encore 1 Forever Young, Masters Of War, Crazy Mary, Inside Job, Alive
Encore 2 Spin The Black Circle, Do The Evolution, Whipping, Rats, Comatose, Rockin' In The Free World
Twenty-nine songs, five of which came from their first album and six came from their new disc (which is actually really good, I suggest that you buy it). Brownie saw them the following day too and he said it was even better. So good in fact, that Theo Epstein jumped on stage, played guitar and sang with them on “Rockin’ In The Free World”. Now that is pretty cool.
Speaking of cool, I seem to be losing mine. Before the PJ show last week, I almost got into a fight at the Boston Sports Grille (on Canal Street, near the Garden) with a jackass who snagged Brownie’s seat. We just bickered back and forth for like ten minutes and he told me to take a swing at him. I almost did, but decided it wasn’t worth it. This guy was a real piece of work. He told me that I look like a guy who “sits in front of a computer all day”. I’m not sure what that means.
Then on Saturday night, this girl who lives across the street from me was yelling at her boyfriend (through her cell phone) at around midnight. I went to bed shortly after only to be woken up by her meathead BF at 2:00 am who was loudly screaming for her (Lindsey) to let him in the house. He was screaming and screaming, so finally I yelled, “Shut the fuck up”, which was met with a “Why don’t you come out here and fight?”
I didn’t feel like it, so I stayed inside. His buddy got him to calm down and he drunkenly drove away. Why am I doing this? Do I want to get an ass kicking? The guy on Saturday would’ve ruined me, though I think that me and the Wednesday guy would’ve been a decent row. I really think that I am looking for to get my head beat in. Not sure why though.
Two final things: one, I’m not sure why Jeff never emailed me back with his Simpsons quotes. I’ll have to ask him about that. Two, I’m going to be in St. Louis next Monday and Tuesday, so I’m not sure when next week’s strip is going to be loaded up. Hopefully on Wednesday, but we’ll see. Until then.
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
Tuesday, May 23, 2006
Meta Comic Strip ... One of the Last Ones, I Swear!
Oooh boy, nothing gets the laughs like a comic strip that references the fact that it’s a comic strip. To borrow a phrase from Bill Belichick, this week’s strip, “is what it is”. There’s really not a hell of a lot of subtlety involved with this one, basically I took a comic axiom, “When swearing, press the shift key and then hit the row of numbers randomly” and turned it on it’s ear.
Was it funny? Perhaps. I think it was humorous when Kurt told Eddie he should just say “shit” because it’s easier. That’s actually what got me thinking about this week’s idea. When I read an old comic strip and they use those symbols, how is one to read it aloud? Do you say, “Number sign, dollar sign, ampersand, asterisk, exclamation point my toe!” or do you say, “Shit (or fuck or son of a bitch) my toe!” And if you do say “son of a bitch”, shouldn’t you write it like this “son of a #$&*!” or is that too suggestive?
What the hell am I talking about? Damned or #$&*! if I know, but you can check it out right here: www.room19comics.com
Before I drew and wrote this comic, I actually thought long and hard about it. Why? Because I wasn’t sure if I wanted to have Eddie and his buddies realize that they were in a comic strip. This comic is supposed to be grounded in reality and I was not positive that I wanted to break that fourth wall.
There are some times when that fourth wall breakage is cool, Dobie Gillis from “The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis” was one of the first to do it on television as was Zack Morris from “Saved By the Bell” and that worked well. On his run of the She-Hulk, John Byrne did the same thing and while I never read any of those comics (I was out of comics by then) the reviews were often positive.
I’m not sure if I like what I did though. Like I said, I want to keep Eddie and the other characters in their own universe. And I know that I’m thinking about this a little too much, but it is my characters and my strip and I have a feeling that I compromised it a bit too much in this edition with a cheap joke.
So do me a favor on this one, let’s not talk about it anymore.
Let’s talk about something cool, like last week’s trip to Chicago (BTW, that’s the reason why there wasn’t a new strip or a new Blog update). I went out there last Monday for a conference and I have to say, Chicago is a great town ... lots of fun stuff to do and the people were friendly as hell.
On Monday night, I pretty much stayed in the bar with my work colleagues. Had a few brews, some food and then hit the sack. I was really tired from the flight there and I had to work for a bit too. On Tuesday, I was up at the crack of ass and working through 10 pm, so I was completely wiped. The cool thing is that at night we took a cruise around Lake Michigan and that was a good time.
Wednesday night is when we had a blast, started out with a Cubs/Nationals game. It was the first time that I had been to Wrigley Field and it is the ninth different ballpark that I’ve been to. The other eight are:
Fenway Park
Olympic Stadium
Skydome
Yankee Stadium
Camden Yards
Turner Field
Bank One Ballpark
RFK
Despite it being cold as hell, I was pumped to see Wrigley though. Tried some Old Style brew, not bad, had a Wrigley dog, took in the ivy, the seventh inning stretch (no one famous, just their PA guy who was once shot in the neck) and had a great time with the two dudes that I was sitting next to. Straight out of central casting too, the father is a Chicago fireman and I’m not sure what his son does. But they were good naturedly lamenting about the Cubs and were telling us (I went with my coworker Pete) to watch the two chicks at the end of our aisle, who were absolutely hammered (they were falling out of their shirts and doing some unnatural acts to a hot dog).
The game wasn’t too bad, Cubs pitcher Sean Marshall had a no hitter going through six and he and a trio of Cubs relievers had a one-hitter. Alfonso Soriano got the one hit with a stinging line drive to center. Obviously, it would’ve been cool to see a no-no, but I did get to see a slew of former Sox: Todd Walker, Scott Williamson, Bobby Howry, Matt Murton and Mike Stanton. Seems like a lot of ex-Sox are on the Cubbies, I wonder why?
Before the game we went to a place called John Barelycorn, which was a typical bar. Nothing too special, but they had beer and that was cool with me. After that we hit Mullen’s and that place was a lot of fun. We met a few more people from work and we just started drinking, we each had three Irish car bombs and then started to play flip cup. Apparently, that was the last straw for our waitress because after a half-hour of doing that we were booted.
All-in-all a good night and a good time in Chicago. I would definitely go back.
Was it funny? Perhaps. I think it was humorous when Kurt told Eddie he should just say “shit” because it’s easier. That’s actually what got me thinking about this week’s idea. When I read an old comic strip and they use those symbols, how is one to read it aloud? Do you say, “Number sign, dollar sign, ampersand, asterisk, exclamation point my toe!” or do you say, “Shit (or fuck or son of a bitch) my toe!” And if you do say “son of a bitch”, shouldn’t you write it like this “son of a #$&*!” or is that too suggestive?
What the hell am I talking about? Damned or #$&*! if I know, but you can check it out right here: www.room19comics.com
Before I drew and wrote this comic, I actually thought long and hard about it. Why? Because I wasn’t sure if I wanted to have Eddie and his buddies realize that they were in a comic strip. This comic is supposed to be grounded in reality and I was not positive that I wanted to break that fourth wall.
There are some times when that fourth wall breakage is cool, Dobie Gillis from “The Many Loves of Dobie Gillis” was one of the first to do it on television as was Zack Morris from “Saved By the Bell” and that worked well. On his run of the She-Hulk, John Byrne did the same thing and while I never read any of those comics (I was out of comics by then) the reviews were often positive.
I’m not sure if I like what I did though. Like I said, I want to keep Eddie and the other characters in their own universe. And I know that I’m thinking about this a little too much, but it is my characters and my strip and I have a feeling that I compromised it a bit too much in this edition with a cheap joke.
So do me a favor on this one, let’s not talk about it anymore.
Let’s talk about something cool, like last week’s trip to Chicago (BTW, that’s the reason why there wasn’t a new strip or a new Blog update). I went out there last Monday for a conference and I have to say, Chicago is a great town ... lots of fun stuff to do and the people were friendly as hell.
On Monday night, I pretty much stayed in the bar with my work colleagues. Had a few brews, some food and then hit the sack. I was really tired from the flight there and I had to work for a bit too. On Tuesday, I was up at the crack of ass and working through 10 pm, so I was completely wiped. The cool thing is that at night we took a cruise around Lake Michigan and that was a good time.
Wednesday night is when we had a blast, started out with a Cubs/Nationals game. It was the first time that I had been to Wrigley Field and it is the ninth different ballpark that I’ve been to. The other eight are:
Fenway Park
Olympic Stadium
Skydome
Yankee Stadium
Camden Yards
Turner Field
Bank One Ballpark
RFK
Despite it being cold as hell, I was pumped to see Wrigley though. Tried some Old Style brew, not bad, had a Wrigley dog, took in the ivy, the seventh inning stretch (no one famous, just their PA guy who was once shot in the neck) and had a great time with the two dudes that I was sitting next to. Straight out of central casting too, the father is a Chicago fireman and I’m not sure what his son does. But they were good naturedly lamenting about the Cubs and were telling us (I went with my coworker Pete) to watch the two chicks at the end of our aisle, who were absolutely hammered (they were falling out of their shirts and doing some unnatural acts to a hot dog).
The game wasn’t too bad, Cubs pitcher Sean Marshall had a no hitter going through six and he and a trio of Cubs relievers had a one-hitter. Alfonso Soriano got the one hit with a stinging line drive to center. Obviously, it would’ve been cool to see a no-no, but I did get to see a slew of former Sox: Todd Walker, Scott Williamson, Bobby Howry, Matt Murton and Mike Stanton. Seems like a lot of ex-Sox are on the Cubbies, I wonder why?
Before the game we went to a place called John Barelycorn, which was a typical bar. Nothing too special, but they had beer and that was cool with me. After that we hit Mullen’s and that place was a lot of fun. We met a few more people from work and we just started drinking, we each had three Irish car bombs and then started to play flip cup. Apparently, that was the last straw for our waitress because after a half-hour of doing that we were booted.
All-in-all a good night and a good time in Chicago. I would definitely go back.
Friday, May 12, 2006
The Best of the Simpsons Part One
When I was an uber-nerd, one of my most favorite things in the entire world was when comic books used to crossover. I’d buy them all, whether it was the Avengers meet Alpha Flight, the X-Men battle the Fantastic Four or Power Pack teamed up with Daredevil. I didn’t care one way or the other.
If you’re reading this Blog entry right now and are nodding your head in agreement, my friend Jeff Kuhn have Teamed-Up as they call it and are going for the gimmick thing in dragging readers to our sites. This week we’re starting off with the top ten Simpsons episodes from seasons one through seven. Why? Because choosing ten episodes from seasons one through infinity would’ve taken forever, and if you’re a regular reader of this site, you know that I just don’t have that kind of time.
So, read my list, check out Jeff’s take and then read what his list is all about here http://culturalsoup.blogspot.com//
10. Bart the General (Season 1)
This was the first episode that I can really, really made me laugh. Yes, it is symbolic of the old-school, Bart-centered episodes, but it was really well done. And I remember thinking that it broke a lot of old sitcom rules. For example, when Bart went to an adult he wasn’t talked out of kicking Nelson’s ass, he was encouraged with great enthusiasm and psychoticness from Grandpa and Herman.
Also, when Nelson was tied up he said something to the effect of, “As soon as you untie me, man, I’m just going to beat you up.” On other shows, whenever the bully was about to be bested, he would immediately change his tune. Everyone knows that in the real world of kidom, that sort of stuff never happens.
Lines that made me laugh:
Herman: “The key to Springfield has always been Elm Street. The Greeks knew it, the Carthaginians knew it. Know you do.” (How many shows reference the Carthaginians?)
Bart: “Contrary to what you’ve just seen war is neither glamorous or fun. There are no winners, only losers. There are no good wars, with the following exceptions: the American Revolution, World War II and the Star Wars trilogy.”
Jeff’s take:
This is a pretty good episode, but only because Herman is involved. If my kid was hanging out with Herman, I think I’d check his ass for fingerprints. The one thing I didn’t really like about it was Grandpa being involved. He’s so much better as the crazy guy that says that “family jewels” is said on TV too much, and that there are three too many states.
9. Bart the Lover (Season 3)
The best Bart episodes are always the ones where he’s a bastard. There’s a lot of dirty tricks that he’s pulled over the years, but this one was the dirtiest and the best. As Eddie Haskell once opined, “Nothing’s mean if it’s funny enough.” This episode saw Bart being punished for a yo-yo trick by his teacher, Ms. Krabapple. In order to get her back he cuts out a picture of Gordie Howe and writes a love letter to her.
The letter is a riot, and of course Krabapple falls for it. Bart begins to feel bad for her after seeing her waiting for her date that will never come. He confesses his trick to his parents and instead of making him confess, they all come up with a plan so Krabapple isn’t completely mortified. Again, this sets a sitcom truism (all children must be punished and the “right” thing must be done) on it’s ear. Also, just the randomness of including Gordie Howe. That was awesome.
Lines that made me laugh:
Homer: “Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You.”
Woodrow: “Truly, Yours is a butt that won’t quit.”
Jeff’s take:
I like cruelness as much as anyone, but I actually never liked this episode. In my mind, the first two seasons are like the Supreme Court before John Marshall. They were too afraid to really find their voice, and because of that, they didn’t have much real power. They were noticeable, but unimportant.
Find somewhere else someone can compare the Simpsons to the doctrine substantive judicial review.
8. Homie the Clown (Season 6)
The episodes where Homer quits his job and takes on a new job aren’t usually my favorite ones. However, this one absolutely kills me. From Homer trying his best not to think of clown college, to Krusty betting against the Globetrotters, to Fat Tony and his gang. Just a tour de force of comedy.
Then of course is the amount of money that Krusty owes the mob. Also, Millhouse’s birthday with immortal line, “My dad is a big wheel down at the cracker factory.” This episode really drives home the point that repetition is the key, because when I first saw it I remember not liking it that much. But over the course of a couple of years in syndication, it’s been on at least 35,000 times and the more I watched it, the more I grew to love it.
Lines that made me laugh:
Homer: “That’s it. You people have stood in my way long enough. I’m going to clown college!”
Legs: “I’m seeing double here, four Krustys!”
Jeff’s take:
This was my last cut at #10. In fact, if on the other place, my name wasn’t Tibor, it would have been 10. Can you extend patronage to yourself?
The dude wearing the cowboy hat saying “Brook Lyn” after finding out there can only be one regional Krusty is completely hilarious. Also, Homer beating the little Hamburgerler guy makes me laugh thinking about it. Remember…midget violence=larfs!
7. Bart of Darkness (Season 6)
If you’ve ever owned a pool, this episode rings true. The new friends that you will “coincidentally” make during July and August once you open up your pool is astounding. As usual the Simpsons do a terrific job of encapsulating that in one line, uttered by Jimbo (with hundreds of kids behind him), “Uhm … Mrs. Bart, is your pool open yet?” Of course, there’s the scene with the Amish, Nelson causing Bart to fall out of the tree (“Hey Bart, your epidermis is showing!”) followed by an explanation of why it was so funny and Bart’s screen play.
That’s not even the main plot which centers on Ned being considered a mur-diddly-urdler, or the subplots of Lisa becoming popular, Homer trying to figure out how to run a pool, or Bart playing solo Stratego. If the Jimmy Stewart-type guy didn’t clue you in, this was an homage to Alfred Hitchcock’s “Rear Window”.
Lines that made me laugh:
Milhouse: “Nelson, I think he’s really hurt.”
Nelson: “I said ‘Ha, ha’.”
Amish dude: “Tis’ a mighty fine barn English, but tis no pool.”
Kid: “Hello Mrs. Cumberdale.”
Jeff’s take:
This one is clever in it’s parodying “Rear Window,” I would say definitely a top 20 episode of this era.
I had a pool for a few years growing up, transitioning between city life and the suburbs, and this one really hits the nail on the head, including my friend Nick getting a bigger pool and everyone going over to his house. My Mom was fanatical about the pool though, forcing other kids to bring their parents to baby sit. My dad was less strict, with his thinking if you’re dumb enough to drown in a pool four feet deep, you deserve your outcome.
Bonus points to chlorine-induced ocular damage to the kiddies by Homer.
6. I Love Lisa (Season 4)
When I was coming up with this list, I initially thought that this would be favorite episode of all time. I can’t believe that it didn’t even make the top five. This is the first Ralph-centric episode and quite possibly the best. I have no idea how the writers were able to catch lightning in a bottle, but they way that Ralph Wiggum is written is awesome. They really should’ve gotten an Emmy for it.
Ralph is obviously pretty dumb, but in this episode they give him a certain pathos and heart that makes every guy feel his pain. Be honest with yourself, you’ve set your goals high in the woman department and you’ve been shot down … just like our boy Ralph. And from his first days of having a crush on Lisa to getting crushed by Lisa (on national TV, no less) you just feel his hurt.
The scene that always makes me laugh is when he jumps into the wheelchair dressed as FDR and exclaims, “I’ve come here to play George Washington!” Bonus points to the appearance of the KBBL morning DJs (Bill and Marty) playing “Monster Mash” on Valentine’s Day, Rex the childhood drama king, Bart as John Wilkes Booth going on an insane president killing spree, Ralph’s acting and subsequent exclamation from the gang of bullies (“He makes me want to learn about our founding fathers!” “To the library!”), this was a well-written, well-acted episode. And major bonus points for being the first sitcom based around President’s Day.
Lines that made me laugh:
So many good lines ...
Homer: “Six simple words: I’m not gay, but I’m learn.”
Miss Hoover: “Bart, do you want to play John Wilkes Booth or do you want to act like a maniac?”
Rex: “I will not sit down! Someone’s gotten to you, you deceitful cow!”
Ralph: “My cat’s breath smells like cat food.”
Ralph: “So ... do you like ... stuff?”
Song: “We are the mediocre presidents. You won’t find our faces on dollars or on cents.
There’s Taylor, there’s Tyler, there’s Fillmore and there’s Hayes.
There’s William Henry Harrison, “I died in thirty days!”
We are the adequate, forgettable, occasionally regrettable caretaker Presidents of the USA!”
Jeff’s take:
There is a bar around here that has the Monster Mash on the juke box, and I love playing it when it’s a crowded Saturday night. If WTF!?!? had a face, it would be at Charlie O’s when the Monster Mash is played.
Hey Byron, I choo-choo-choose you!
And there’s a picture of a train!
Remember, read Jeff’s stuff too at: http://culturalsoup.blogspot.com/
If you’re reading this Blog entry right now and are nodding your head in agreement, my friend Jeff Kuhn have Teamed-Up as they call it and are going for the gimmick thing in dragging readers to our sites. This week we’re starting off with the top ten Simpsons episodes from seasons one through seven. Why? Because choosing ten episodes from seasons one through infinity would’ve taken forever, and if you’re a regular reader of this site, you know that I just don’t have that kind of time.
So, read my list, check out Jeff’s take and then read what his list is all about here http://culturalsoup.blogspot.com//
10. Bart the General (Season 1)
This was the first episode that I can really, really made me laugh. Yes, it is symbolic of the old-school, Bart-centered episodes, but it was really well done. And I remember thinking that it broke a lot of old sitcom rules. For example, when Bart went to an adult he wasn’t talked out of kicking Nelson’s ass, he was encouraged with great enthusiasm and psychoticness from Grandpa and Herman.
Also, when Nelson was tied up he said something to the effect of, “As soon as you untie me, man, I’m just going to beat you up.” On other shows, whenever the bully was about to be bested, he would immediately change his tune. Everyone knows that in the real world of kidom, that sort of stuff never happens.
Lines that made me laugh:
Herman: “The key to Springfield has always been Elm Street. The Greeks knew it, the Carthaginians knew it. Know you do.” (How many shows reference the Carthaginians?)
Bart: “Contrary to what you’ve just seen war is neither glamorous or fun. There are no winners, only losers. There are no good wars, with the following exceptions: the American Revolution, World War II and the Star Wars trilogy.”
Jeff’s take:
This is a pretty good episode, but only because Herman is involved. If my kid was hanging out with Herman, I think I’d check his ass for fingerprints. The one thing I didn’t really like about it was Grandpa being involved. He’s so much better as the crazy guy that says that “family jewels” is said on TV too much, and that there are three too many states.
9. Bart the Lover (Season 3)
The best Bart episodes are always the ones where he’s a bastard. There’s a lot of dirty tricks that he’s pulled over the years, but this one was the dirtiest and the best. As Eddie Haskell once opined, “Nothing’s mean if it’s funny enough.” This episode saw Bart being punished for a yo-yo trick by his teacher, Ms. Krabapple. In order to get her back he cuts out a picture of Gordie Howe and writes a love letter to her.
The letter is a riot, and of course Krabapple falls for it. Bart begins to feel bad for her after seeing her waiting for her date that will never come. He confesses his trick to his parents and instead of making him confess, they all come up with a plan so Krabapple isn’t completely mortified. Again, this sets a sitcom truism (all children must be punished and the “right” thing must be done) on it’s ear. Also, just the randomness of including Gordie Howe. That was awesome.
Lines that made me laugh:
Homer: “Dear Baby, Welcome to Dumpsville. Population: You.”
Woodrow: “Truly, Yours is a butt that won’t quit.”
Jeff’s take:
I like cruelness as much as anyone, but I actually never liked this episode. In my mind, the first two seasons are like the Supreme Court before John Marshall. They were too afraid to really find their voice, and because of that, they didn’t have much real power. They were noticeable, but unimportant.
Find somewhere else someone can compare the Simpsons to the doctrine substantive judicial review.
8. Homie the Clown (Season 6)
The episodes where Homer quits his job and takes on a new job aren’t usually my favorite ones. However, this one absolutely kills me. From Homer trying his best not to think of clown college, to Krusty betting against the Globetrotters, to Fat Tony and his gang. Just a tour de force of comedy.
Then of course is the amount of money that Krusty owes the mob. Also, Millhouse’s birthday with immortal line, “My dad is a big wheel down at the cracker factory.” This episode really drives home the point that repetition is the key, because when I first saw it I remember not liking it that much. But over the course of a couple of years in syndication, it’s been on at least 35,000 times and the more I watched it, the more I grew to love it.
Lines that made me laugh:
Homer: “That’s it. You people have stood in my way long enough. I’m going to clown college!”
Legs: “I’m seeing double here, four Krustys!”
Jeff’s take:
This was my last cut at #10. In fact, if on the other place, my name wasn’t Tibor, it would have been 10. Can you extend patronage to yourself?
The dude wearing the cowboy hat saying “Brook Lyn” after finding out there can only be one regional Krusty is completely hilarious. Also, Homer beating the little Hamburgerler guy makes me laugh thinking about it. Remember…midget violence=larfs!
7. Bart of Darkness (Season 6)
If you’ve ever owned a pool, this episode rings true. The new friends that you will “coincidentally” make during July and August once you open up your pool is astounding. As usual the Simpsons do a terrific job of encapsulating that in one line, uttered by Jimbo (with hundreds of kids behind him), “Uhm … Mrs. Bart, is your pool open yet?” Of course, there’s the scene with the Amish, Nelson causing Bart to fall out of the tree (“Hey Bart, your epidermis is showing!”) followed by an explanation of why it was so funny and Bart’s screen play.
That’s not even the main plot which centers on Ned being considered a mur-diddly-urdler, or the subplots of Lisa becoming popular, Homer trying to figure out how to run a pool, or Bart playing solo Stratego. If the Jimmy Stewart-type guy didn’t clue you in, this was an homage to Alfred Hitchcock’s “Rear Window”.
Lines that made me laugh:
Milhouse: “Nelson, I think he’s really hurt.”
Nelson: “I said ‘Ha, ha’.”
Amish dude: “Tis’ a mighty fine barn English, but tis no pool.”
Kid: “Hello Mrs. Cumberdale.”
Jeff’s take:
This one is clever in it’s parodying “Rear Window,” I would say definitely a top 20 episode of this era.
I had a pool for a few years growing up, transitioning between city life and the suburbs, and this one really hits the nail on the head, including my friend Nick getting a bigger pool and everyone going over to his house. My Mom was fanatical about the pool though, forcing other kids to bring their parents to baby sit. My dad was less strict, with his thinking if you’re dumb enough to drown in a pool four feet deep, you deserve your outcome.
Bonus points to chlorine-induced ocular damage to the kiddies by Homer.
6. I Love Lisa (Season 4)
When I was coming up with this list, I initially thought that this would be favorite episode of all time. I can’t believe that it didn’t even make the top five. This is the first Ralph-centric episode and quite possibly the best. I have no idea how the writers were able to catch lightning in a bottle, but they way that Ralph Wiggum is written is awesome. They really should’ve gotten an Emmy for it.
Ralph is obviously pretty dumb, but in this episode they give him a certain pathos and heart that makes every guy feel his pain. Be honest with yourself, you’ve set your goals high in the woman department and you’ve been shot down … just like our boy Ralph. And from his first days of having a crush on Lisa to getting crushed by Lisa (on national TV, no less) you just feel his hurt.
The scene that always makes me laugh is when he jumps into the wheelchair dressed as FDR and exclaims, “I’ve come here to play George Washington!” Bonus points to the appearance of the KBBL morning DJs (Bill and Marty) playing “Monster Mash” on Valentine’s Day, Rex the childhood drama king, Bart as John Wilkes Booth going on an insane president killing spree, Ralph’s acting and subsequent exclamation from the gang of bullies (“He makes me want to learn about our founding fathers!” “To the library!”), this was a well-written, well-acted episode. And major bonus points for being the first sitcom based around President’s Day.
Lines that made me laugh:
So many good lines ...
Homer: “Six simple words: I’m not gay, but I’m learn.”
Miss Hoover: “Bart, do you want to play John Wilkes Booth or do you want to act like a maniac?”
Rex: “I will not sit down! Someone’s gotten to you, you deceitful cow!”
Ralph: “My cat’s breath smells like cat food.”
Ralph: “So ... do you like ... stuff?”
Song: “We are the mediocre presidents. You won’t find our faces on dollars or on cents.
There’s Taylor, there’s Tyler, there’s Fillmore and there’s Hayes.
There’s William Henry Harrison, “I died in thirty days!”
We are the adequate, forgettable, occasionally regrettable caretaker Presidents of the USA!”
Jeff’s take:
There is a bar around here that has the Monster Mash on the juke box, and I love playing it when it’s a crowded Saturday night. If WTF!?!? had a face, it would be at Charlie O’s when the Monster Mash is played.
Hey Byron, I choo-choo-choose you!
And there’s a picture of a train!
Remember, read Jeff’s stuff too at: http://culturalsoup.blogspot.com/
Wednesday, May 10, 2006
The Cult of No Personality
No. This isn’t about Corey Glover and the boys of Living Colour—BTW, one of the most underrated bands of the last 20 years. This is about getting fame. In my strip this week, Layne brings up Paris Hilton and how she’s known world wide for virtually nothing. The only thing that she’s know for, her looks and her money, weren’t even worked for. She was born with both.
This brings us to the following question, is it easier to be famous now? I think that the answer has to be yes. Hilton has zero talent, except for what she did to her former boyfriend one night. I have to admit, she looks to be really proficient at that. But I don’t think that skill translates well into fame or fortune.
You want to see the strip that spawned this inner monologue? Check it out here:
www.room19comics.com
Hilton was born with a silver spoon up her nose and she has worked that into a semi-hit television reality series, the desire of a lot of men and her style is imitated by some women. But how did she do it? That’s the billion dollar question. The first time I remember hearing about the Hilton sisters was about five years ago. All I heard was that Paris and her equally vapid sister Nicky would go out every night, get completely trashed and say stupid things. Aside from finding them attractive, in that slutty sort of way, I didn’t give them too much attention, and thought that they would disappear into a mountain of cocaine and down a river of Red Bull and vodka.
But I underestimated the power of the Hilton. After awhile, they began to appear every where: Paris with that cocked head look and stoner smile, Nicky with those bat-shit crazy eyes. Then things pushed forward even more, they were guest starring on TV shows. First as kitschy walk-ons and then on talk shows begging for some kind of “edge”. Then Paris got her own series, then she was in a few movies, then she was supposed to record a CD (which hasn’t seen the light of day). How could one person with no talent have so many irons in the fire?
I mean, it can’t be all the work of her PR person can it? If so, whatever that person is being paid, it’s not enough. While it’s no secret that Americans like their celebrities stupid and slutty, Hilton has taken it to a new extreme. She is so dumb and so slutty that she’s almost a cartoon of herself (and I think there may have been talk of a Hilton sisters cartoon at one point), but no one seems to give a shit.
People still take her picture, still ask her questions (which are never answered intelligently) still appears on the cover of a truck-load of magazines (yet is never completely nude). Maybe we’re the idiots here. It’s obvious that Hilton is laughing all the way to the bank, she doesn’t even hide that smug smile. Maybe she found some Rosetta Stone that unlocks the key to being well-known without doing any work. I don’t know.
I guess the only thing you can do is congratulate her, right? Nah. I’d still rather be me than her.
Speaking of me, I finished my Web Design courses on Monday night. Completely and totally done. D-O-N-E. I can’t even begin to tell you how much of a relief that this is. It was about 48 weeks, and I have to say, I worked hard for that year. I was a little sad to leave, because I did enjoy learning a new skill, but at the same time, I’m not going to miss the homework.
If you want to see my final project, check it out here:
www.boston-braves.com/carreonphoto/carreonphoto
It’s supposed to be an updated version of this site:
www.carreonphotography.com
I think that I did a decent job. Now all I have to do is update my current site and find some new customers. That should be happening in the next couple of weeks or so.
Speaking of the next few weeks, next week there will be no new strip. I am going to be in Chicago for the entire week, so I won’t have time to upload anything. Sorry about that one, kiddies. Also, on Friday, come back to this site as we will be doing something pretty cool. I don’t want to tell you exactly what it is, but I think that you’re going to like it.
This brings us to the following question, is it easier to be famous now? I think that the answer has to be yes. Hilton has zero talent, except for what she did to her former boyfriend one night. I have to admit, she looks to be really proficient at that. But I don’t think that skill translates well into fame or fortune.
You want to see the strip that spawned this inner monologue? Check it out here:
www.room19comics.com
Hilton was born with a silver spoon up her nose and she has worked that into a semi-hit television reality series, the desire of a lot of men and her style is imitated by some women. But how did she do it? That’s the billion dollar question. The first time I remember hearing about the Hilton sisters was about five years ago. All I heard was that Paris and her equally vapid sister Nicky would go out every night, get completely trashed and say stupid things. Aside from finding them attractive, in that slutty sort of way, I didn’t give them too much attention, and thought that they would disappear into a mountain of cocaine and down a river of Red Bull and vodka.
But I underestimated the power of the Hilton. After awhile, they began to appear every where: Paris with that cocked head look and stoner smile, Nicky with those bat-shit crazy eyes. Then things pushed forward even more, they were guest starring on TV shows. First as kitschy walk-ons and then on talk shows begging for some kind of “edge”. Then Paris got her own series, then she was in a few movies, then she was supposed to record a CD (which hasn’t seen the light of day). How could one person with no talent have so many irons in the fire?
I mean, it can’t be all the work of her PR person can it? If so, whatever that person is being paid, it’s not enough. While it’s no secret that Americans like their celebrities stupid and slutty, Hilton has taken it to a new extreme. She is so dumb and so slutty that she’s almost a cartoon of herself (and I think there may have been talk of a Hilton sisters cartoon at one point), but no one seems to give a shit.
People still take her picture, still ask her questions (which are never answered intelligently) still appears on the cover of a truck-load of magazines (yet is never completely nude). Maybe we’re the idiots here. It’s obvious that Hilton is laughing all the way to the bank, she doesn’t even hide that smug smile. Maybe she found some Rosetta Stone that unlocks the key to being well-known without doing any work. I don’t know.
I guess the only thing you can do is congratulate her, right? Nah. I’d still rather be me than her.
Speaking of me, I finished my Web Design courses on Monday night. Completely and totally done. D-O-N-E. I can’t even begin to tell you how much of a relief that this is. It was about 48 weeks, and I have to say, I worked hard for that year. I was a little sad to leave, because I did enjoy learning a new skill, but at the same time, I’m not going to miss the homework.
If you want to see my final project, check it out here:
www.boston-braves.com/carreonphoto/carreonphoto
It’s supposed to be an updated version of this site:
www.carreonphotography.com
I think that I did a decent job. Now all I have to do is update my current site and find some new customers. That should be happening in the next couple of weeks or so.
Speaking of the next few weeks, next week there will be no new strip. I am going to be in Chicago for the entire week, so I won’t have time to upload anything. Sorry about that one, kiddies. Also, on Friday, come back to this site as we will be doing something pretty cool. I don’t want to tell you exactly what it is, but I think that you’re going to like it.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
When I Get to the Bottom I Go Back to the Top of the Slide
You should probably know that lyric, it’s the first one from the Beatles’ “Helter Skelter”, which not so coincidentally was also the title of Charles Manson’s race war. Since I have Manson on the brain these days—I’m not going to start a stable full of blood thirsty flowerchildren in the middle of the desert, but I have been rereading Ed Sanders’ excellent book, “The Family”—and I came up with an idea for the old strip.
It sort of works on two levels, for me at least, because other than reading this book, the overall crux of the strip is semibiographical. Turns out that my mom went to high school (St. Mary’s High in Lawrence, MA) with Linda Kasabian. If you’ve seen either one of the “Helter Skelter” TV movies or read the book, you’ll know that Kasabian was a member of the family who went along during the Tate murders.
If you can believe her testimony, she was too freaked out to actually kill anyone and when the massacre started, she was in a ball crying. After the incident, she took her kid and went back to New England where she lived for a few months until the California DA offered her a deal to testify against her former friends. She did, and basically got off scott-free.
That’s the background of this week’s strip, which you can check out for yourself at:
www.room19comics.com
When I was in high school and first saw the movie, I was totally creeped out and obsessed about the whole trial. Not so much the murder part of it, the whole cult of personality that Manson was able to create for himself that got people to actually believe that he was both Jesus Christ and Satan. Why would anyone believe this? Why would they kill for him? How could you think that the Beatles were talking to you through a record? Just generally, what the fuck?
Then my mom told me about how she knew of Kasabian and it brought on even more questions: what was she like, was she a total freak, how did she get out to California, did you ever hang out with her? Tons of them. And if Kasabian could be coerced into going out there and be part of some crazy death cult, what stopped my mother (or any of her friends) from doing that?
The only thing she had to tell me was, “I don’t know. She was kind of weird.” Nothing else. That was more frustrating than not knowing anything. I thought, here my mother was a person who knew someone who was part of the most famous trial of the century (OJ hadn’t made the run for the border yet) and no first-hand knowledge could be passed. It drove me nuts and sort of pissed me off.
Thinking about it over these last few years, it has occurred to me that why would my mom know Linda Kasabian, except in passing? Kasabian was obviously whacked out to begin with and from all accounts, my mom and her friends seemed fairly normal. Why would a person who was normal hang out with an out-and-out freak? I certainly didn’t when I was in school and I made a point to stay the hell away from them. Wouldn’t my mom do the same thing?
And how was she to know that Linda Kasabian would be famous, or in the very least infamous? Think of all the weirdos you know, chances are pretty good that none of them are going to achieve any type of fame or infamy. If they weren’t cool people would you spend time with these people in the hopes that they do something fucked up so you could get some modicum of popularity by simply knowing the person?
I’ve written about this phenomenon before, the friends of the famous, who are known because they happen to hang around with someone famous. There is something really detestable about these leeches and hangers on who have made their name without talent or substance simply because they are friends with a talented person. And as bad as Jessica Simpson’s kindergarten teacher showing up on VH1 to talk about how driven Jessica was when she was five, it is ultimately even more despicable to be a friend of a mass murder who is using the crime to further his/her fame.
I guess, in the long run, I’m glad that my mom didn’t know Kasabian well. Things probably would’ve been different for me if my mom chose the path that her classmate chose. However, in this particular comic strip, Eddie doesn’t have a chance to reflect on this introspection and, like most of do when faced with a disappointment, just blurts out what’s on his mind.
Another thing that I’m glad about this strip is that Eddie gets to deliver the dis to Kurt instead of the other way around. I was looking through a bunch of the older strips and it’s usually Kurt one-upping Ed. I don’t want to turn Eddie into a sad-sack loser, every once in a while he has to have something bright to say, otherwise it’s the same old stuff week after week. And that gets boring.
Speaking of boring, I didn’t do a heck of a lot this weekend, except eat. Mom and dad came over on Friday night to watch the wedding video, they hadn’t seen it yet, and we went to Vinny T’s. Not a bad place to eat, for a chain restaurant. I had the pork chops and vinegar peppers. Truthfully, Aly’s was better as Vinny T’s didn’t use real vinegar peppers. They just roasted some red peppers and chucked them on the pork.
Saturday I spent most of the day doing homework, which absolutely sucked because it was gorgeous outside. But for three and a half hours, I was stuck in front of my PC working on my final project. Can you believe that my last class is next Monday? It seems like just yesterday I was going in the office to meet with Kurt Carl about possibly going there. Even though it’s a certificate program, I’ve learned a ton. Check back here next week for my final web site, it’s pretty decent.
Saturday night, Lauren and Bob came over and we went to Abe and Louie’s for an awesome steak dinner. It was a bit pricey, but well worth it. My filet mignon tasted tremendous, as did the clam chowder and the apple pie with ice cream I had for dessert. After that, they came over to our place and we just hung out.
Sunday was more homework and I bought a new pair of running shoes. I guess that I’m getting into this running thing a bit more seriously now. My knees have been killing me since I started running outside and on the treadmill. Hopefully these new kicks will stop that from happening.
It sort of works on two levels, for me at least, because other than reading this book, the overall crux of the strip is semibiographical. Turns out that my mom went to high school (St. Mary’s High in Lawrence, MA) with Linda Kasabian. If you’ve seen either one of the “Helter Skelter” TV movies or read the book, you’ll know that Kasabian was a member of the family who went along during the Tate murders.
If you can believe her testimony, she was too freaked out to actually kill anyone and when the massacre started, she was in a ball crying. After the incident, she took her kid and went back to New England where she lived for a few months until the California DA offered her a deal to testify against her former friends. She did, and basically got off scott-free.
That’s the background of this week’s strip, which you can check out for yourself at:
www.room19comics.com
When I was in high school and first saw the movie, I was totally creeped out and obsessed about the whole trial. Not so much the murder part of it, the whole cult of personality that Manson was able to create for himself that got people to actually believe that he was both Jesus Christ and Satan. Why would anyone believe this? Why would they kill for him? How could you think that the Beatles were talking to you through a record? Just generally, what the fuck?
Then my mom told me about how she knew of Kasabian and it brought on even more questions: what was she like, was she a total freak, how did she get out to California, did you ever hang out with her? Tons of them. And if Kasabian could be coerced into going out there and be part of some crazy death cult, what stopped my mother (or any of her friends) from doing that?
The only thing she had to tell me was, “I don’t know. She was kind of weird.” Nothing else. That was more frustrating than not knowing anything. I thought, here my mother was a person who knew someone who was part of the most famous trial of the century (OJ hadn’t made the run for the border yet) and no first-hand knowledge could be passed. It drove me nuts and sort of pissed me off.
Thinking about it over these last few years, it has occurred to me that why would my mom know Linda Kasabian, except in passing? Kasabian was obviously whacked out to begin with and from all accounts, my mom and her friends seemed fairly normal. Why would a person who was normal hang out with an out-and-out freak? I certainly didn’t when I was in school and I made a point to stay the hell away from them. Wouldn’t my mom do the same thing?
And how was she to know that Linda Kasabian would be famous, or in the very least infamous? Think of all the weirdos you know, chances are pretty good that none of them are going to achieve any type of fame or infamy. If they weren’t cool people would you spend time with these people in the hopes that they do something fucked up so you could get some modicum of popularity by simply knowing the person?
I’ve written about this phenomenon before, the friends of the famous, who are known because they happen to hang around with someone famous. There is something really detestable about these leeches and hangers on who have made their name without talent or substance simply because they are friends with a talented person. And as bad as Jessica Simpson’s kindergarten teacher showing up on VH1 to talk about how driven Jessica was when she was five, it is ultimately even more despicable to be a friend of a mass murder who is using the crime to further his/her fame.
I guess, in the long run, I’m glad that my mom didn’t know Kasabian well. Things probably would’ve been different for me if my mom chose the path that her classmate chose. However, in this particular comic strip, Eddie doesn’t have a chance to reflect on this introspection and, like most of do when faced with a disappointment, just blurts out what’s on his mind.
Another thing that I’m glad about this strip is that Eddie gets to deliver the dis to Kurt instead of the other way around. I was looking through a bunch of the older strips and it’s usually Kurt one-upping Ed. I don’t want to turn Eddie into a sad-sack loser, every once in a while he has to have something bright to say, otherwise it’s the same old stuff week after week. And that gets boring.
Speaking of boring, I didn’t do a heck of a lot this weekend, except eat. Mom and dad came over on Friday night to watch the wedding video, they hadn’t seen it yet, and we went to Vinny T’s. Not a bad place to eat, for a chain restaurant. I had the pork chops and vinegar peppers. Truthfully, Aly’s was better as Vinny T’s didn’t use real vinegar peppers. They just roasted some red peppers and chucked them on the pork.
Saturday I spent most of the day doing homework, which absolutely sucked because it was gorgeous outside. But for three and a half hours, I was stuck in front of my PC working on my final project. Can you believe that my last class is next Monday? It seems like just yesterday I was going in the office to meet with Kurt Carl about possibly going there. Even though it’s a certificate program, I’ve learned a ton. Check back here next week for my final web site, it’s pretty decent.
Saturday night, Lauren and Bob came over and we went to Abe and Louie’s for an awesome steak dinner. It was a bit pricey, but well worth it. My filet mignon tasted tremendous, as did the clam chowder and the apple pie with ice cream I had for dessert. After that, they came over to our place and we just hung out.
Sunday was more homework and I bought a new pair of running shoes. I guess that I’m getting into this running thing a bit more seriously now. My knees have been killing me since I started running outside and on the treadmill. Hopefully these new kicks will stop that from happening.
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